Cheryl Cole Announces That She and Chicharito Are An Item

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Thursday, 9 May 2013

image for Cheryl Cole Announces That She and Chicharito Are An Item
Cheryl says that Simon has told her that as of now her chances of getting the X-Factor job are about 97 percent.

NEW YORK CITY - Cheryl Cole, who is being touted to replace the fired Britney Spears on X-Factor, was in town shooting a lipstick commercial.

She was asked by Bedroom Pillow Talk's Carolina Chipotle about joining Simon Cowell's X-Factor cast.

Chezza, as she was nicknamed by Queen Elizabeth, smiled and in her Geordie accent replied that she would be thrilled to get to sit next to Simple Simon, as she refers to Cowell.

When told that Demi Lovato gets to sit next to Simon, Cheryl licked her red lipsticked lips and simply said, maybe not this year.

Cole was asked if she was seeing anyone. She blushed and said that she is currently dating Manchester United soccer star Chicharito (Little Pea), a native of Guadalajara, Mexico.

Javier Hernández Balcázar, which is Chicharito's real name, wears number 14, for the Man U Red Devils, and that number is now Cheryl's favorite number.

SIDENOTE: Cheryl was asked if she still had any feelings for ex-boyfriend Derek "The Dancing Dude" Hough, who appears on Dancing With The Stars. Cole giggled and said that on a scale of one to ten the number would have to be zero.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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