HOLLYWOOD - (Sports Satire) - LaLaLand Daily's Valerie Vistawood has broken the story that three famous soccer players will be starring in a movie about one of soccer's greatest players. The motion picture will star Chicharito, Eric Cantona, and D…
NEW YORK CITY - (Sports Satire) - The International Inquirer is reporting that two of the greatest soccer players of all time have just opened up a sports bar in Madrid. According to writer Paco Tabasco, the bar which is co-owned by Cristiano Rona…
NEW YORK CITY - King Charles III, as the executor of his mother's estate, has just informed the news media that the queen bequeathed her prized Attila The Hun Commemorative Sword to former Manchester United Red Devil soccer player Jose Baltazar Herna…
MANCHESTER, England - (Sports Satire) - England's Tickety Boo News has just learned from an inside source that the six Glazer children, who own Man U, have asked the Manchester civic leaders to change the name of the Mersey River. The name of the…
SAO PAULO, Brazil – (Sports Satire) – Pele has just been informed by Cinderella St. Lamb, with the Balls News Agency that the goalkeeper for Pele’s Sao Paulo Red Grasshoppers, Brazilian soccer team, Allegro Cabeza De Vaca, has just been named the bes…
LOS ANGELES – (Sports Satire) – The Los Angeles Post-Gazette spoke with L.A. Galaxy star Javier Hernandez, better known as Chicharito. The 32-year-old expressed that he is very upset and unhappy with the teams (4-9-3) record. He noted that sale…
LOS ANGELES – (Sports Satire) – NBC Sports is reporting that soccer superstar Javier Hernandez, better known as Chicharito (the Little Pea), wants David Beckham to join him on his old team, the Los Angeles Galaxy. The 45-year-old Beckham played fo…
LOS ANGELES – In one of the most lopsided soccer matches ever, the Los Angeles Galaxy, led by the great Chicharito, defeated the highly touted Nicaraguan National Soccer team, Los Platoneros, 17-0, in a charity exhibition game. The Galaxy’s supers…
SANTA MONICA BEACH, California – One of the greatest soccer players of all time, Pele, flew to California and met with another great soccer player, Javier Hernandez Balcazar, better known as Chicharito. They had macaroni enchiladas and several pit…
LOS ANGELES – Javier Hernandez Balcazar, better known as Chicharito (the Little Pea), recently told the Los Angeles Sports-Chronicle that he is seriously thinking about purchasing his old team, Manchester United. Chicharito, who owns a chain of Hu…
GUADALAJARA, Mexico - Noted Manchester United Red Devils soccer player Javier Hernández Balcázar was visiting his relatives in Mexico when he was asked about the rumor that he had dumped British girlfriend Cheryl Cole. Chicharito informed Laguna V...
NEW YORK CITY - Cheryl Cole was in New York City filming a television commercial for Jose Cuervo Tequila. The British singer was asked how things were going with her and her boyfriend, Manchester United soccer player Javier Hernández Balcázar bett...
PYONGYANG, North Korea - Word out of North Korea is that Kim Jong Un will be having a fantastic Super Bowl Party and he has invited such celebrities as Dennis Rodman, Lindsay Lohan, Chicharito, and Chelsea Handler. The North Korean leader said tha...
NEW YORK CITY - British soccer star Chicharito flew into the Big Apple to have some photos taken for an upcoming poster. The Manchester United player, whose real name is Javier Hernández Balcázar, was asked by Zorro La Bamba with The Sports Bet Ga...
CHICAGO - Playguy Magazine has just announced that it has signed British singer Cheryl Cole to appear in it's February Valentine's issue. The men's publication had been trying to get Ms. Cole to agree to do the nude layout spread for a little over...
MILWAUKEE - Little six-year-old Milly Cottondandy had no idea that she would win The Heinz Ketchup Sports Drawing Contest when her mother Leslie told her to draw a picture of a soccer player. Milly, who is a devoted fan of Manchester United and es...
CANCUN, Mexico - Soccer star Javier Hernández Balcázar, AKA Chicharito flew down to Cancun for a few days. When he arrived he was immediately asked where his British girlfriend Cheryl Cole was. He replied that she was in Manhattan filming a pantyh...
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