Grupo Bimbo Buys Sara Lee; U.S. Executives Suggest Name Change

Funny story written by P.M. Wortham

Tuesday, 9 November 2010

image for Grupo Bimbo Buys Sara Lee; U.S. Executives Suggest Name Change
Nothing says "I Love You" like a Bimbo Bakery cake.

Mexico bread baking conglomerate Grupo Bimbo, will purchase the U.S. Sara Lee product portfolio for an undisclosed cash transfer and their collection of cake and cookie recipes. The U.S. management team however, cautions against using the parent company's name on products sold here.

It took some time, according to Sara Lee investment banker Myron Neenoze, but the deal will help both companies provided they approach the U.S. market in the right way. "Avoiding the suggestion that the company gets its yeast from a local whorehouse might be a good first step", says Neenoze. "Sometimes company names just don't make it because of the colloquial language translation, as in this case".

Name change options were apparently discussed, including "Bimbo-Sara Lee" and "Sara Lee-Bimbo", even "Bimbo-Little Girl Cakes" were considered while American executives suggested a "thumbs down".

Controlling more than 51% of the stock, Grupo Bimbo executives weren't pleased at the suggestion that their own company name would not be acceptable in American markets. Deciding on a final name for the U.S., future products from the former Sara Lee company will carry the brand, "Bimbo Bakeries". Bone - Appetite, baby.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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