To make the boring old always-banged-on-about 'FTSE 100' more interesting, they have decided to move on to something ten times bigger and ten times better: TOOTSIE - 10.
The head of FTSE claims: "It just wasn't appealing to the generation, so I think the name TOOTSIE will help us achieve... whatever it is we do. See? I'm the head, and I don't even find it interesting. Now it's called TOOTSIE - 10 it reminds me of my ten toes, and I do!"
RIGHT. Well, kids, for Christmas we all know what you'll be looking for; a chance to visit the inside of the TOOTSIE - 10. The 8 year olds will almost be as excited, for the modern remade book 'The Greatest Women In History'. With Mother Theresa, Joan of Arc and Vanessa Hudgens, they'll be spitting with excitement - or disgust?
FTSE 100 is so happy to be called TOOTSIE 10, that they are giving away free jobs as part of their venture to grasp what the hell it is they do. Some will think 'what a great Christmas present'.
Or, those of the human nature will simply be content with an X-Box.