Chicago, IL - UPDATE 2 - Despite low demand for toxic securities and commercial paper, prices are rising due to Federal Sugar Daddy Fed Chairman, Ben 'Helicopter Monkey with it' Bernanke.
No, we don't mean toxic like aspartame, these are toxic in the financial sense.. bad for your portfolio, not bad for your prognosis.
The Metropolis Flash, Flame and Flicker Electric company had to stop utilizing these toxic assets for fuel as previously reported.
Not only are the people of Metropolis sad, but they are unemployed. Secretary 'money bags' Paulson is ecstatic, as always. Strangely, when briefing on the situation, Chairman Bernanke of the United States Federal Reserve cautioned against irrational exuberance, and contacted his Bubble Attack Team (BAT) to closely monitor the situation. It seems his bubble attack team has been fired. He now has a bubble re inflation team, BRIT at work on the job.
The price of these securities has increased dramatically from one to 100 Chinese Ameros per ton, ruling out the possibility of any use for fuel. The securities once reduced the cost of power for the utility to levels not seen since Great Depression, of which Chairman Bernanke is the premier student. Soon, Ben will be known as the Father of The Greater Depression.
