AIG gets an additional 37.8 billion to cover bar tab

Written by Robert W. Armijo

Friday, 10 October 2008

image for AIG gets an additional 37.8 billion to cover bar tab
Apparently, there was a cover charge too.

New York, New York - The Federal Reserve of New York just extended an additional 37.8 billion dollar line of credit to the financially troubled AIG, after it was initially lent 85 billion dollars just weeks ago.

The NY Fed deemed the additional 37.8 billion dollars necessary once again after AIG executives realized that they did not have the cash reserves to cover the bar tab they ran up at the luxury spa get away a couple of weeks back. AIG executives, therefore, requested that, that bill be forwarded to the NY Fed for remittance as well.

"We got a bill of particulars from the St. Regis Monarch Beach Resort that evidenced the AIG executives running up a 37.8 billion dollar bar tab," said an employee for the NY Fed. "But when we opened it, we all thought we were being punked. Everyone at the office got bellyaches, tearing up we laughed so hard. Then we started turning the office upside down, looking for the hidden cameras, calling out Ashton Kutcher name."

Federal Reserve of New York employees then thought they would share the laughs with U.S. Treasury Dept., Secretary, Henry Paulson, when he instructed them to go ahead and pay the 37.8 billion dollar AIG bar tab.

"He told us to go ahead and pay it," said a still stun employee at the NY Fed. "Suddenly, everybody on the speakerphone stopped laughing. You know, you can really hear the sound of a pin drop. I thought that was just an old saying, until Bob from accounting took one out and let it drop to the floor."

Personnel at the NY Fed did not believe it was possible to run up a bar tab that high just drinking alcohol so they requested permission to place a hold on the payment of the 37.8 billion dollars pending an investigation into the matter, but their request was denied.

"Paulson told us over the speakerphone that it didn't matter whether or not the AIG executives drank that much in booze," said an employee at the NY Fed. "Paulson said, 'It's the nation that would get stuck with the hangover anyways, so why bother."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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