McCain Wins Bush Endorsement for Presidency: He Will 'Destroy the US Economy Like I Have!'

Funny story written by Felix Minderbinder

Thursday, 6 March 2008

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WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) - President George W. Bush formally endorsed Republican John McCain for president on Wednesday, calling him "that moron who will destroy the US economy like I haveā€¦sending our best jobs overseas, creating higher prices and inflation and bigger debts and sending our economy even further down the drain with endless war!"

McCain "will fight wars everywhere for Big Oil and Israel and cause the deaths of thousands more American soldiers to enrich fat-cat Republicans and firms like Halliburton and Exxon Mobil too," chortled Bush.

Bush spoke at a Rose Garden ceremony in which McCain jumped whenever Bush said frog.

Bush gave McCain the red-carpet treatment at the White House just after McCain sealed the Republican presidential nomination with victories in four states.

"McCain will borrow and waste trillions more dollars on more wars like I have, and he will keep our youth either flipping burgers or coming home in body bags!" Bush shouted to huge applause. "A McCain presidency will be like a 3rd term for me."

The endorsement gave Democrats ammunition to use against McCain, since Bush is wildly unpopular with most Americans because of the Iraq war which the US is losing, not to mention the sick and dying US economy.

The Democratic National Committee said McCain "offers a third term of George W. Bush."

McCain is 71 and would be the oldest person ever elected to a first US presidential term. He said he has "great admiration, respect and affection for that fool Bush" and wants him to campaign for him as much as possible.

"I hope that the chimp will find time from his busy looting schedule to be out on the campaign trail with me," McCain said.

Bush laughed off a question as to whether his endorsement could hurt McCain more than it helps him, saying, "I've destroyed the Republican Party with my wars and pillaging the economy for rich Republicans so McCain doesn't have a hope of entering the Oval Office anyway."

McCain then promised to foreclose on all those deadbeat homeowners and to drive oil over $200 per barrel and food prices "into the sky. The US dollar will become worthless, the rich will get richer and the Wall Street crooks who benefit from the subprime fraud will get off completely free."

"When I'm elected president there will be more money business!" McCain screamed to riotous Republican applause.

--Copyright Felix Minderbinder Live Wire

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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