Written by Gail Farrelly

Saturday, 4 August 2007

image for Amtrak Provides Free Booze, AA Responds
On a toot!

No sooner had Amtrak announced a program providing $100 in free booze on selected train trips than Alcoholics Anonymous announced a new AA program on wheels.

"We go wherever drunks can be found," the head of AA announced, "whether it be on land, on the sea, or on trains." He noted that numerous young Hollywood stars and starlets, attracted by the free booze, had recently signed on for Amtrak trips. "The outlook for AA business on Amtrak is exceedingly favorable."

There's a rumor that Dr. Phil may also be hopping onboard an Amtrak train to provide a new venue for his TV show in segments about rescuing alcoholics.

The new AA program will have the initials AAAA, standing for All Aboard Amtrak Alcoholics!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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