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Funny satire stories about Trains

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Woman Peeled Banana In A Suggestive Manner

Funny story: Woman Peeled Banana In A Suggestive Manner

A woman travelling on a train in northern England, was witnessed peeling a banana in a suggestive, erotic and provocative manner, claims a man, who might have got it wrong. Heiki Bauer, 19, a German student studying at the University of Hull, was...

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Fatties on trains and planes complain, but bogs for 'skinnies' remain!

Funny story: Fatties on trains and planes complain, but bogs for 'skinnies' remain!

Be aware, this story is "utter shite", Ed. Even the most normal size people hate the thought of entering a bog on a plane or train, they stink! However, people who enjoy fast travelling and, very much fast food before boarding and, on board (ch...

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Tragedy As Graffiti Artists Hit By Freight Train

Funny story: Tragedy As Graffiti Artists Hit By Freight Train

Darwinism strikes again as three graffiti artists have been hit by a freight train in Brixton. British Transport Police are treating the deaths as "unexplained" but a worker filling in an accident form at the scene was found to have filled in the...

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Japanese Commuters Riot As Train Leaves Early Again

Funny story: Japanese Commuters Riot As Train Leaves Early Again

There were troubled scenes in Japan this morning after a commuter train left a station early for the second time in six months. Last November, management on the Tsukuba Express line between Tokyo and the city of Tsukuba sincerely apologised when t...

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Woman's Bad Breath Kills Seven on Tourist Train

Funny story: Woman's Bad Breath Kills Seven on Tourist Train

A Denver woman accidentally killed seven fellow passengers with her bad breath while aboard a popular sightseeing train ride on the border of New Mexico and Colorado. Passengers on the J&O Tours train started screaming and passing out when Thi...

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Men Banned From Public Transport

Funny story: Men Banned From Public Transport

In a controversial move announced today, all transport companies across the USA will be taking steps to ban men from using public transport at peak times. This follows a successful campaign by Free the Space, an activist group founded by Chloe Ben...

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Corbyn plans National Uniform

Funny story: Corbyn plans National Uniform

Following on from his announcement that women only trains be run, to stop women being molested, Labour leadership frontrunner has gone further by suggesting that all people wear a simple garment that is both loose and unflattering to stop any sort of...

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Top Ten Reasons Why Indian Politician Stalin Slapped Metro Train Passenger

A video of Indian politician Stalin slapping a train passenger went viral on the Internet. Here are a few reasons that may have triggerred the politician's action. * The guy asked "Stalin Uncle" to gently brush his hand against his cheek. * There was a mosquito on his face. Jayalalitha's metro trains are already a breeding ground for disease-causing insects. * Ticket inspector was getting c...

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"Bag on Empty Seat" Passengers Finally Analysed

Funny story: "Bag on Empty Seat" Passengers Finally Analysed

Passengers on busy trains who put their bags on the unreserved seat next to them will most likely die alone, a new study has revealed. The study, carried out by the finest minds in Europe, also revealed that travellers who unnecessarily filled the...

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"Snakes on a train" movie to begin production

Funny story: "Snakes on a train" movie to begin production

It's one more clear indication that Hollywood is running out of ideas for movies, with another very similar film to one we have already seen is in production. Mutual film company confirmed that "Snakes on a train" will begin production next month...

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"National Railway Replacement Bus Service Day" to honour Bob Crow

Funny story: "National Railway Replacement Bus Service Day" to honour Bob Crow

In a move demonstrated to have more animation than the average commuter on a London Tube strike day, the Rail Maritime and Transport Union have presented a petition to Downing Street to declare the 27th of December "National Railway Replacement Bus S...

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"Understanding" Commuters tell train driver not to apologise about delays

Funny story: "Understanding" Commuters tell train driver not to apologise about delays

Train driver Mohammad O'Toole expressed his relief today and praised the commuters on the 8.13am to Birmingham New Street train for being so understanding after he announced delays would mean they would get in 30 minutes late to their destination.

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Minnesota Signs A Deal With Arizona To Take 800 Rail Cars Filled With Snow

Funny story: Minnesota Signs A Deal With Arizona To Take 800 Rail Cars Filled With Snow

MINNEAPOLIS - State Senator Stormy Waterbook [D-Minneapolis] has just informed the press that the state of Minnesota will be shipping 800 gondola rail cars filled with snow down to Arizona. The senator stated that the snow has been piling up and t...

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Commuters flee rush-hour file

Passengers fled on to tracks after a box file burst open on a train during rush hour yesterday in central London. The file contained dozens of lengthy, boring business reports and detailed minutes of interminable committee meetings. Some passen...

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Driver leaves train on line

Rail passengers were delayed this morning when the train driver abandoned his cab and walked off. The 7.05 London train from Hull Paragon station departed 30 mins late after GNER located a replacement driver. British Transport police were cal...

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The Reason Why Illegal Aliens Hate Slow Moving Southbound Trains

Funny story: The Reason Why Illegal Aliens Hate Slow Moving Southbound Trains

WASHINGTON, D.C. - The United States Immigration Department has stated that due to some complaints from 313 U.S. citizens, the practice of flying illegal aliens back to their home country will be discontinued. The USID stated that busing them back...

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Monday Morning Commute: Noticeably Quieter!

Chicago, IL - Commuters on Monday morning were taken aback at just how noticeably quiet their journey was. This report comes after a apparently much more jovial Friday morning L ride. "This is definitely...a lot quieter than Friday." said con...

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Droylsden finally gets its tram

Funny story: Droylsden finally gets its tram

After being in the planning stage for twenty years, the much vaunted Manchester tram system is to get it's first of several new extensions that will take the tram network into East Manchester. This week, the first part of this opens, with stops in Dr...

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Breaking news…

Trump Says Democrats Should Thank Him for Being Such A Terrible President

...Because they never would've won the House by such a wide margin without him!
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