Written by Jaggedone

Wednesday, 7 March 2018

image for Global burger producer decides to add 'real, fresh meat' to their burgers
Yep, you lot are due for even more slaughtering...MOO!

A sensational revolution is occurring in the burger world! Real, fresh meat is to replace the reconstituted crap normally on offer.

Several burger kings were about to be declared veggies because basically there is no real meat in their crap anyway. However, veggies and vegans protested vehemently to the 'US HIGH COURT OF INJUSTICE' blocking the idea. So, one global crap burger producer came up with a brainwave and decided it is time to slaughter even more cows because their solution is putting, guess what? Fresh, real meat into their burgers!

Slaughter houses all over the US are rubbing their bloody hands after the announcement, and mass GMO soya producers, destroying natural habitats, are too, because the poor cows have to be made even fatter, and quicker now. Of course pumped up with a few, harmless hormones, right?

So, burger lovers, your dreams have come true at last. Real, fresh meat, instead of old bones, gelatin, guts, intestines, and basically leftovers after the cow has been stripped of its prime cuts for the haute cuisine industry.

The writer of this spectacular spoof (is it a spoof or reality?) just puked down the bog...He got a veggie bone stuck in his throat after eating a real veggie burger!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Meat, hamburger




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