Written by Jaggedone

Wednesday, 20 December 2017

image for Chinese pot noodles hit by pizza tsunami!
Chinese call it 'The Domino Effect' Pot Noodles are Jurassic!

The basic diet of billions of Chinese is being swept from under their bare feet by an 'Italian tsunami' causing a 'Domino' effect on the nutritional foundations of the most populated country on the planet!

Chinese pot noodles, eaten by the rich, the poor, and scavenging street dogs (if they're not eaten themselves), are being abandoned for the new nutritional Messiah, Made in Italy, Pizza Margarita & co! A global burger company also attempted to change the eating habits of the Chinese, but failed miserably because they used dogs meat imported from Korea, and the Chinese prefer their own woof woof burgers!

Pot Noodle street food joints, the backbone of Chinese society, are now being swept aside by fake Italian / Chinese in disguise, pizza bakers called, Gino, Franco, Giuseppe, Verdi (Who?), Botticelli (Who?), etc. And punters, queuing for miles, are desperate to get their teeth into a Pizza Funghi, or Salami (also made with dogs meat, but the Chinese can't tell the difference yet!).

Kids are refusing to eat their noodles, and the whole noodle industry is going down the pot (literally)! Even the Chinese Prime Minister was seen digging into a Domino, but luckily the smog in Beijing was so dense hardly anybody saw him!

Real Italian pizza bakers are heading towards China hoping for a gold rush. Fake Indian and Turkish ones too. In fact, pizza Made in China will be the latest "Golden Fleece" to keep the global economy turning in the form of a Neapolitan specialty not made by Mama!

Trump has also got into the act by ordering his US pizza bakers, run by the Mafia, to hit the Chinese market with impunity, and in return he has promised not to build a 'New Great China Wall!' A Mexican one is enough! Taco, taco, Ole, Ole, burrito, burrito, ban the illegal crap and buy Chinese pizzas! Grazzi Mille!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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