"As we know, there are known knowns. And there are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns. That is to say we know there are some things we do not know, but there are also unknown unknowns, the ones we don't know we don't know."
So said out of work US politician Donald Rumsfeld a few months ago. The world gasped and looked for a translation or decoding of the statement. So far though none has been forthcoming.
But now The Spoof can report that Rumsfeld has won a new job this side of the Atlantic on the strength of his way with words.
H M Revenue and Customs Services are in the process of writing new forms and codes of practice to be issued to the public in the near future and who better to draft these than wordsmith Rumsfeld?
A spokesman commented:
"We have been getting concerned of late that the public is beginning to understand our literature and thus learning how to play the system.
This has been due largely to the 'Plain English Campaign' but now with Donald on-board the public won't have a clue where to begin and we'll be in the money again"
The ex-Defence Secretary told the Spoof:
"Inasmuch as I feel that I have achieved certain givens, I can't really give much of certain achievements that may or indeed may not be viable in a holistic sense"
