Amazon Kindles are Movin' On Out of Target Stores

Funny story written by Gail Farrelly

Saturday, 5 May 2012

image for Amazon Kindles are Movin' On Out of Target Stores
Have print books at hand, in case Kindles go out on strike

But the electronic readers are not at all happy about it, according to Head Kindle Hedda.

"Amazon officials never discussed this whole thing with us," complained Hedda, continuing, "apparently they just annoyed Target so much that the business association came to an end. Phooey!" She went on to explain that now the poor Kindles are greatly inconvenienced, but Amazon doesn't care one bit. She said, "We used to love Amazon. But now they've become the typical employer. No concern at all for the needs of their employees."

Hedda, who has made her home at Target for some time now, is really annoyed about being evicted. She told a reporter that the after-hours life at Target has been just peachy. She and her cohorts have enjoyed watching high-resolution TV, playing video games, and reading the many books that Target sells. "I like the real thing, print books," Hedda said, adding that the Kindles also loved sneaking into the coffee shop area of the Target store and making themselves late-night snacks, including burgers and ice cream sodas. "Now, thanks to Amazon, we'll all be housed in some bleak warehouse locations," Hedda said, with a tear in her eye.

But apparently the Kindles plan to fight back. "A work stoppage or a prolonged strike are distinct possibilities," confided Head Kindle Hedda, a gleam having replaced the tear in her eye. She continued, "I'm not saying any more about the when, the why, or the how. Just know that someday soon, you'll turn on your Kindle, and you'll be getting no service at all. Nada."

Looks like what William Congreve wrote in 1697 in The Mourning Bride still holds: "Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned / Nor hell a fury like a woman scorned."


The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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