Arsenal's Missed Targets

With the news that long term arsenal target Julian Draxler has joined PSG on a four year contract we at BATTL news decided to pre-empt all the news and sport websites. We are great believers in the hyperbole and complete shrieking nonsense around football being the thing that has destroyed the game. Not the endless streams of money (nobody says a word about baseball contracts, formula one drivers...

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Dr Farquar and Embarrassing Bodies

Questions from my patients. Embarrassing Bodies. Do we all deserve the body we stand in? I'm a zookeeper. My mouth is where my anus should be. My penis is where my right thumb should be. Should I be careful in the monkey enclosure at feeding time? Claude Nutts DR F: Lucky you! So you still talk shite but don't need a dummy anymore? I've an embarrassing body. It's the body of elders at...

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Mexican Beer Importers Bracing For A Trump Ban, Meanwhile Business Quadruples

Funny story: Mexican Beer Importers Bracing For A Trump Ban, Meanwhile Business Quadruples

In the face of President Trump's threatened ban, stocks are soaring for Mexican brewers, as well as distributors and sellers of Mexican beer. Reached by phone, Molly Snipes, CEO of Molotov distributors in Denver, talked to this reporter about the...

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Democrats Are Better Lovers Than Republicans opinion poll finds

A poll of 900 American singles found by a two-to-one margin that Democrats are better in bed, with 49% of the respondents saying that President George W Bush is the best-looking candidate while 53% of the women imagine that challenger John Kerry woul...

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Trump vows to undo Michelle Obama's policies to "Make America Eat Again"

Through the majority of his campaign, Donald Trump fired up much his supporters with vows to undo many of defining policies of President Obama's administration, policies such as Obamacare, international agreements, & not jailing Hillary Clinton.

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