Matthew's Suicide Note
Scotland Yard Police are trying to trace the origins of a suicide note. Police were summoned to Blackfriars Bridge last night when a man out walking his dog spotted a pair of boots mid-way across the bridge on the pavement beside a briefcase full of...
Read full storyMets fans suspended for use of delusion enhancing drugs
New York -- Major League Baseball has banned the entire fan base of the New York Mets from participating in any aspect of the game. The ruling by new MLB Commissioner Rob Manfred takes effect immediately and lasts until the end of the current season.
Read full storyHillary stool samples sent accidentally to Chair of Federal Reserve
Washington AC/DC - (Ass Mess): It was red feces all round as a two kilo bag of Hillary Clinton's stools was delivered unexpectedly to the desk of Janet Yellen, chair of the Board of Governors of the US Federal Reserve System. An accompanying not...
Read full storyLincoln Monuments Attacked When Americans Realize That He Created Income Tax
Upon reading an article in a national newspaper stating that Abraham Lincoln was the one responsible for starting federal income tax, angered Americans across the country began a hate campaign against all memorabilia of the formerly beloved President...
Read full storyCool Moon vs. hot Sun
Standing next to a 4-meter-tall-5-meter long catwalk wall, I saw a cat condescendingly walking along the top of the wall. Seeing me, the cat stopped; suspiciously looked at me as a source of threat. Now, he launched a 3-pronged drones: seeing, hearing and olfactory. The confused cat put the bottom down; kept wagging his tail and winked inquisitively. At this time, instinct came to his aide an...
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