Cameron reveals Scotland was adopted when it was a child
Shocking revelations have risen from inside Whitehall, where today Prime Minister David Cameron revealed to all that Scotland was adopted when it was a very early age. "It gives me no pleasure to reveal that Scotland was an orphan country when we fo...
Read full storyTeam Loses "Must Win" Game, Decides Just Screw It For The Rest Of The Season
The Topeka Grizzlies, a semi pro football team, has just decided to forget about the remaining 6 games and concentrate on their day jobs and families, a spokesman for the team said yesterday. The team, which was 1-3 in the Midwest Central Leagu...
Read full storyUniversity's New Princess B.A. Attracts Thousands Of Phone Inquiries
Mothers with small girls throughout Britain have been besieging colleges such as Oxford with inquiries about degrees and doctorates in Princessology. The new course has been offered to cater for tens of thousands of keen children obsessed with dr...
Read full storyDaniel O'Donnell: Outrageous Claims Infuriate Erstwhile Fans
Everyone's favourite cuddly and genial country singer, Daniel O'Donnell, has enraged thousands of fans in Ireland, both North and South. Apparently, the man unfortunately caricatured by malicious critics as the housewife's favourite, is actually not...
Read full storyAll Jewish Boys To Be Called "Yosef" In Israel
ISRAEL - Israeli officials were caught in a revealing lie late last month as the country celebrated the Jewish New Year. Shortly after declaring the most popular boy's name in Israel to be "Yosef", the interior ministry was forced to concede that the...
Read full storyJohn McCain Regrets Choosing Sara Palin
WASHINGTON - Former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin and her family, including husband Todd Palin, daughters Bristol and Willow Palin and son Track Palin were involved in a drunken fistfight at a house party in Anchorage several weeks ago. The one-time vice...
Read full storyPastors Say Jimmy Carter Is Going To Hell
Two North Carolina Baptist pastors are observing President Jimmy Carter's 90th birthday by suggesting that he might go to hell for saying that Jesus wouldn't discriminate against LGBT people. Pastor David McManus accused Carter of embracing the "h...
Read full storyUnited States Marine Corps besmirched in 'Rite To Be Forgotten' scandal
The Pentagon, Virginia - The United Kingdom's highest military honor for valor in the face of the enemy, awarded in 1998 to the United States Marine Corps, has been expunged from history in a new twist in the 'right to be forgotten' data scandal.
Read full storyUS interviewing for maverick scientist position
The US government is currently interviewing for the role of a maverick scientist to save the world from the Ebola threat. As cases of the deadly virus increase daily the US are concerned that they do not have anyone suitable to save the day. "W...
Read full storyMan claims he's the only white guy in country named Tyrone
Tyrone Biggs of Trenton, NJ claims he's the only white guy in the country named "Tyrone". "I'm the only one," said Biggs, a thirty-eight year old husband and father of two young girls. "People who learn my name before they meet me in person are pr...
Read full storyJehovah's Witless Faithful Boycott Three-in-One Lubricants
Claiming that the doctrine of the trinity, or "three-in-one" was clearly a lie concocted by Satan to lead true believers away from God's holy word, the leadership of the Jehovah's Witless Church announced a boycott of all Three-in-One lubricating pro...
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