Obama Refuses Air Strikes And Instead Turns Off Porn Access to Combat ISIS in Iraq
In a controversial move for the president of the United States, often criticised as being cautious in acting in the Middle East, today he decided to switch off all transmission of adult pornography to any radical groups in Northern Iraq. Under siege...
Read full storyLittle Miss Muffet Joins Islamic State
MOSUL- The fabled story book character, Little Miss Muffet, has joined the notorious Islamic State. In a video published on Al Jazeera, Miss Muffet, dressed in a suicide vest and bearing an AK-47, pledged to bring "glory to the Caliph" and "wipe o...
Read full storyEvolution Confirmed in Lost Bible
JERUSALEM- Archaeologists have discovered a lost book from the Christian New Testament, allegedly confirming the principles of evolution. The work was found in a cave near the city of Jerusalem. Entitled the 'Book of GEROM', (Genetic Evoluti...
Read full storyFuel stolen from pipeline under the West Wing
Washington DC - The Secret Service has discovered $20m of fuel is missing from a pipeline running under the West Wing, part of the Biden-Keystone** strategic reserve. A probe into its upstream reservoir feed this weekend found clear signs of tamp...
Read full storyThe "Giving" Tree: A Children's Story About the Koch Brothers
With apologies to Shel Silverstein Once there was a tree . . . And she loved two little boys named Charles and David. And every day the boys would come and they would gather her leaves and make them into crowns and play king of the world. They would climb up her trunk and swing from her branches and eat apples. And they would play hide-the-money. And when...
Read full storyJoan Rivers Attacks Her Pro Palestinian Plastic Surgeon for Making Her Look Like Yassar Arafat - Israel Refuses Her Asylum As West Bank Rejoices
Joan Rivers recent comments seemingly to support Israeli actions, backfired as her Beverly Hills plastic surgeon took revenge. Apparently sick of being associated as Joan Rivers loyal plastic surgeon, he had been subjected to daily protests from anti...
Read full storyGazan estate agents protest saying Hamas is bad for business leads to overthrow of regime - Foxtons set to open first local branch
Following weeks of aerial bombardments on Gaza, local estate agents, having watched as their business and client base collapsed overnight and living on their last bit of commission, marched through downtown Gaza demanding an end to the madness. L...
Read full storyBeing a Newspaper Reporter Jumps from Being the Worst to the Next-to-Worst of 200 Jobs in America
It might be old moldy news, but being a newspaper reporter is the next-to-worst of 200 jobs in America, according to distinguished organizations which employ people who don't do much work and get paid handsomely for spin-doctoring public relations semantic weaponry disguised as "news". According to Poynter.org: Newspaper reporters can add CareerCast.com to the list of sources telling them to fl...
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