Barrenness Warsi sacked from Foreign Orifice job
London, UK - Sadass wannabe Sayeeda Warsi is out on her fat arse tonight following a spat about terrists and Trojan Horse stuff. The jumped up nobody from Solihull has been given the Order of the Boot after publicly self-destructing her reputation...
Read full storyEbola Virus Tweets: "Keep Donald Trump Out of Here"
MONROVIA, LIBERIA--An Ebola virus today tweeted: "Heard Donald Trump will visit Africa in a few days. Please don't let this form of vermin in. Keep Donald Trump out of here!" The Ebola virus was apparently responding to rumors that Donald Trump...
Read full storyShades of 'Ecuador judicial model' as $100m bung to German court ends F1 boss' bribery trial
Munich - Not since bent NYC lawyer Steven Donziger perpetrated the mass bribery of Ecuador's justice department, judges, court officials, etc, in the notorious $19bn Chevron scam has another sovereign state's judicial system been exposed as blatantly...
Read full storyPutin orders entire population of Russia to sit cross-legged with fingers on lips
In another attempt to increase his grip on his country, Russian leader Vladimir Putin order the entire population of the former-Soviet state to sit down where they were with their legs crossed and their fingers on their lips. Sources close to Krem...
Read full storyBe My Virtual Saviour
A lot must be considered when picking the right religion to be on-line ordained into. Due diligence is key to finding the right path to enlightenment, and whilst it looks very easy for those tambourine-rattling, devil-dodgers on Songs of Praise and The Only Way Is Amish, a degree of actual commitment and clarity of mind is critical for spiritual success. My personal journey began on a Saturday m...
Read full storyJustin Bieber spat with orlando bloom intensifies - offers acting lessons
Gossip pages around the world quickly picked up on the news that Justin Bieber had provoked orlando bloom once again, leading Peter Jacskon asking Bieber to leave his buddy alone. Not satisfied that he had made him cry in Ibiza in front of his friend...
Read full storyGene Simmonds to Buy Gaza Strip
Stinking rich hyper-mega-rock-star Gene Simmonds, who made his trillions leading the heavy-metal band CHISZ, announced his plan to bring peace to the Middle East today. "I've just inked a deal to buy the Gaza strip, and am negotiating an offer on...
Read full storyBill O'Reilly Arrested In Albuquerque for Cross Dressing, Purse Snatching, Shoplifting and Impersonating a Police Officer
ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. - FOX News talking head Bill O'Reilly was arrested last light in downtown Albuquerque for a number of charges, including Impersonating a Police Officer. "We discovered Mr. O'Reilly in a downtown alley with a sharp long wire. He...
Read full story