Goofy is Disney's MK Ultra Mind Control Agent
It has been claimed that Goofy is the most complained about character at the Disney theme park. One Mother said, "He is just creepy. My little butter-ball wanted to have his picture taken with Goofy and he turned away and farted in my face. Out-...
Read full storyMan Describes Near-Death Experience: Light At End of Tunnel Changed to Energy Efficient LED
Those who claim to have had a near-death experience almost always describe it similarly: the feeling of floating in a tunnel toward a very bright light. But according to retired electrician Clovis Deekins, who has had two such experiences five year...
Read full storyBoston Bruins Snowed Out
The Boston Bruins have canceled a game because of the overnight blizzard in Boston. The Bruins estimated that two-thirds of the seats at the arena would be empty because the rapid transit was not running. Fans are irate. They would be there becau...
Read full storyNew Pot Laws Effects on Colorado
In November, two states, Colorado and Washington, legalized recreational pot use. What impact have the new laws had upon those states? To get answers, reporter Kanye Blankenbaker spoke with Dune Halverson from the Colorado State Attorney General's office. Blankenbaker: Dune, how has the passage of the law affected the state, if at all? Halverson: Man, where's my shoe? I lost my shoe,...
Read full storyRotten Broccoli Movie Review
Terrible summer blockbuster 'The End' is due to hit cinema's this week and critics are already panning the film with respected popcorn cruncher Roger Ebert describing it as 'just three hours of credits', albeit the most thrill inducing, stomach churning, tear jerking, laugh out loud three hours of credits ever. German director Uwe Schmitz retorted that 'yes it is three hours of rolling credits, bu...
Read full storyGarnett and Pierce Face the Guillotine of Social Media
Kevin Garnett can help any number of teams win a championship, but in Boston he is treated like Danny Ainge's used T-paper. Just because you score 25,000 points doesn't mean you will have any more respect among the Boston social media. Late in...
Read full storyJustin Bieber and Taylor Swift - Music's Latest Couple
SANTA MONICA - Two of the most popular young singers in America were spotted walking hand-in-hand on the famed Santa Monica Pier. Justin Bieber, who recently got dumped by long time girlfriend Selena Gomez and Taylor Swift who has had more boyfrie...
Read full storyHorse Meat Actually Not That Bad Say Brits As New Chain Of Fast Food Restaurants Open
Despite a frozen food producer being caught up in a scandal over horsemeat found in beef products in the United Kingdom, Sweden and France many Brits are confessing that they actually enjoyed the taste of horse, with many even admitting that they cou...
Read full storyHorsemeat Contaminated with Cow
A horse has been found with 60% beef in it. Which technically makes it a cow but the animal is very confused. It has raised concern over how many other horses are infact cows and therefore potentially contaminating our favourite foods. Consume...
Read full storyContinued Failure To Vet Beef Supplies Would Result In Flogging A Dead Horse, Says Food Industry
Tesco, Findus, Aldi and other food suppliers named in the recent horsemeat revelations, today formed a consortium to try to re-establish confidence in their beef products, and to put the meat-contamination scandal behind them. 'We do not wish to b...
Read full storyBed bugs, vermin and primitive sanitation: Mayor Bloomberg's lowdown on Prince Charles' vacation home
New York - "You wake up in the middle of the night with a hunch the royal four poster's crawling with parasites," is how the Mayor of New York described his stay at Birkhall, Scotland "Still, kinda reassuring to know the real bloodsuckers are fa...
Read full storyRichard III: Even Non-Brits Want Him
Yogi Berra was right. "It ain't over till it's over." And for Richard III? It definitely ain't over, not by a long shot. Not only are officials in Leicester and York fighting to rebury his remains, but other folks -- all of them dead -- want...
Read full storyCountry Music Shocker! Dolly Parton Getting Divorced
WATERLOO, Iowa - Dolly Parton, 66, showed that she can still sing with the best of them as she performed to a standing room only crowd at The Crop Rotation Convention Center in Waterloo. Parton performed all of her hits including "Jolene," "I Will...
Read full storyEast Coast Blizzard Snow To Be Shipped To Colorado
NEW YORK CITY - The mayor of the Big Apple, Michael Bloomberg has just informed the news media that he has been in contact with several mayors of East Coast cities regarding the horrific blizzards. He spoke with the mayors of Philadelphia, Baltimo...
Read full storyKevin Garnett To Be The New Charlotte Bobcats Coach
CHARLOTTE - Word from the NBA rumor mill is that Boston Celtic Kevin Garnett will not be traded after all. But the 6-foot-11-inch tall center will however be leaving Boston. According to Tango Brisket with Sports Territory Magazine, who broke the...
Read full storyPaula Deen Getting That Huge Navel Orange Look
MEMPHIS - Paula Deen was in Memphis visiting her high school home economics teacher Mrs. Orchid Burlapinski. Mrs. Burlapinski, who turned 91, on January 19, which also happens to be Paula's birthday as well, was shocked to see that her former pupi...
Read full storyWhite House Conversation About Unmanned Drone Strikes Leaked
Washington DC: A Washington DC newspaper has obtained a recording of a White house meeting between President Obama and his National Security Advisor discussing the use of armed unmanned drone aircraft against terrorists. The paper published a transcript. President: What's the latest rationale for unmanned drone strikes? National Security Advisor: Drone strikes are to be used only against ove...
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