A Brief Procedural History Of The Grace Lee Right-to-die Case, Written As An R-Rated Play For Second Graders.
A BRIEF PROCEDURAL HISTORY OF THE GRACE LEE CASE, WRITTEN AS AN R-RATED PLAY FOR SECOND-GRADERS. Grace: Kill me. Grace's parents: No, it's a sin. Grace: Fuck you. Kill me. Grace's parents: No, you'll burn in Hell, forever. Grace: Fuck you, I'll ask a Judge. Grace: Judge, let 'em kill me. Grace's parents: No, don't, Judge. it's a sin. Judge: Fuck you. Doctors? Kill her.
Read full storySD Senator George McGovern dies at 90: refuses to enter Heaven over "streets of gold"
SIOUX FALLS, SD (ABSNN) - Richard Nixon cheated to beat him out of the Presidency, but George McGovern made it to Heaven while Tricky Dickey remains a smoldering charcoal briquette in Hell. McGovern died yesterday at the age of 90. He remained, to...
Read full storyPressure builds on Villas-Boas, to clear his throat
Tottenham Hotspur manager Andre Villas-Boas is facing mounting pressure from fans to have his throat cleared by his next interview. Listeners and viewers to the Portuguese's interviews have been mildly grossed out by his phlegm filled larynx since...
Read full storyTory Grandees Tell Party to "Shake off Elitist Image"
In an article in today's Observer leading Tory figures including Lord Norman "On Yer Bike" Tebbit warn Prime Minister "Call Me Dave" Cameron to lose their "arrogant toffs" label. It has been a tempestuous week for the party, having lost one of its...
Read full storyThe Girl, Not the Director
HBO's biographical assassination of Alfred Hitchcock and his relationship to his 'discovery' 'Tippi' Hedren became the subject of a television biopic-short on bio and long on picking at the scab. It's called The Girl not The Birds revisited. T...
Read full storyBig turnout for people who are voting about the general issues in their country and the parties who are contesting for power.
A general erection today for everybody in Britain, and what a big one it was with hundreds of inhabitants turning out in their thousands to vote on the important issues of today. As it were there was a landslide for the nutty natters over 90's nudist...
Read full storyLecture in Nottingham by Prof. Grimesworthy
'We must ensure a future for our children' Nottingham University's Professor Grimesworthy Ph.D gave a speech to the Muggedanddrugged Lane Community Association last week in Nottingham. He arrived at the centre, parked up his Range Rover, posed for the press photographs, and entered the shed. He was welcomed at the 15 seated Le Grand meeting hall at the side of the disused and fire-bombed...
Read full storyKate Gosselin's Wish Finally Looks Like It's Coming True
HOLLYWOOD - Kate Gosselin flew in to L.A. from her home in Reading, Pennsylvania to meet with executives with The Contempo Television Network (CTN). They wanted to speak to her about the possibility of getting her back on television with her very...
Read full storySenator Joe Manchin has Existential Crisis after Reading Facebook Comment
Facebook vigilante, Bobby D. Foster's has struck yet another Senator. The unprovoked Facebook comment reads as follows: Dear Senator Manchin, I just wanted to inform you that I am quite disappointed that your chin is not as manly as you name suggests. Have a nice day. -BDF The Senator has reportedly not shown up to a single congressional session since he read the post last Thursday.
Read full storyNicole Kidman Tells American Idol's Nicki Minaj To "Cool It Sister!"
ST. BARTS, West Indies - Australian actress Nicole Kidman and her fellow Aussie husband, singer and new American Idol judge Keith Urban had a few days off and they decided to fly over to St. Barts. The couple from down under were the special guest...
Read full story