Twitter bans German Nazis in Germany: Herr Hitler was a huge "twit" too!
Twitter have bowed to the requests of the German government and banned German Nazis from being enormous "Twits" on the German Twitter site. As for the rest of the world they can continue "twitting" their evil messages with impunity. A spokesman fo...
Read full storyRomney demands the Dalai Lama be thrown out of US following his "fuck it" remark!
BROWN UNIVERSITY, Rhode Island (ABSNN) - His Holiness, the Dalai Lama was thought to have told students who did not share his message of love and universal peace to "fuck off" or "fuck it," according to the closed-caption banner running beneath his v...
Read full storyX-Factor's Simon Cowell Is Getting Fed Up With L.A. Reid's Diva Antics
LOS ANGELES - Simon Cowell is thrilled with the way things are going with his two brand new X-Factor judges Britney Spears and Demi Lovato. The 52-year-old English music mogul, who has shown time after time that he has the Midas Touch, has however...
Read full storySarah Palin Takes The Blame For Bristol's Dancing With The Stars Elimination
HOLLYWOOD - Sarah Palin watched in subdued horror as Tom Bergeron announced that the star going home on week four of Dancing With The Stars was Bristol "The Pistol" Palin. Instantly "Snowflake" as Sarah is known, put her hand to her mouth, closed...
Read full storyTennessee woman lives according to Bible for one year--and is pissed about it!
DAYTON, Tennessee (ABSNN) - A female Dayton blogger, Rachel Held Evans, lived an entire year according to the rules laid out in the King James Version of the Bible. Among other biblical tenants she followed, she addressed her husband as "Master," an...
Read full storyMy life as a man #22
Keeping up with the English Jones' My neighbor, Gerry, the British guy who came here 23-years-ago, has a beautiful wife, a very nice home (that he keeps up like a palace), three wonderful adult children, and seven grandchildren. His two grown sons and his one adult daughter were all born in a coal-heated flat in the "South of London," wherever the hell that is. His two eldest grandchildren, a...
Read full storyBBC Launch Probe Into Bruce Forsyth "False Chin" Allegations
Beleaguered BBC bosses were left reeling today after yet another scandal broke involving one of their biggest star turns. Already engulfed in controversy following the Jimmy Savile abuse scandal, BBC chiefs fear the corporation known as 'Auntie' m...
Read full storyIt's the pits! Brad 'is an affront' in women's perfume ad
New York - "At least he isn't wearing that Hobbitesque Dildo Baggins beanie hat," was how one Manhattan fragrance consultant put it about Brad Pitt's latest reincarnation as a perfume industry troll. "But that horrid little goatee of his just has...
Read full storyRoundabout Named Best Roundabout Round About Here by Roundabout Appreciation Society
A roundabout, in Holgate on the outskirts of York, which lies in the heart of Yorkshire a county that sits in the North-East of England, the country that dwells to the left (if you look at it from space) of France. Yes that roundabout. It has been na...
Read full storyBoston Celtics Make Their First Unkind Cut
Christmas is over for the Celtics. Dionte Christmas, which is not quite like Little Christmas, has been cut by the Boston Celtics in time for the holidays (Halloween upcoming). Little Christmas arrives in January, but Dionte Christmas leaves in O...
Read full storyHow long will I have to wait? There's an app for that
Everybody has been, at some point, stood in a queue. Whether it is a queue for a roller coaster or for a Subway Meal Deal, it is sometimes handy to know how long it will take to get through the queue. Step forward (if the queue's moved on) the latest...
Read full storyBiden: I've got binders of women too, if anyone's interested
WASHINGTON, D.C.--In the aftermath of Mitt Romney's comment Tuesday that he poured over "binders full of women" for cabinet appointees while governor of Massachusetts, Vice President Biden took the time to inform reporters gathered at the Rose Ga...
Read full storyGeorge Lopez Says Kirstie Alley Needs To Go On The Tortilla Diet
LA HABRA - Comedian George Lopez was in La Habra checking on a low-rider that he saw in The Cucamonga Chit Chat Chronicle. As he was sitting in The Giggling Guacamole Restaurant he was approached by Pico de Gallo a reporter with Tittle Tattle Toni...
Read full storyRPattz and K-Stew Are Back Together - The $195,000 Bentley Did The Trick!
MARINA DEL REY, California - After what seemed like an eternity Kristen Stewart, the stoic Hollywood actress who never smiles, managed to crack a smile at a local Mexican food restaurant in Marina Del Rey. Stewart, was dumped by her boyfriend Rob...
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