New York Woman Reports Near-Life Experience
While the so-called near-death experience (NDE) is a relatively commonly known phenomenon, scientists have for the first time encountered what appears to be a near-life experience (NLE). The very first documented NLE account came from 41-year-old...
Read full storyTitanic memorial journey delayed by a "Flock of seagulls!"
Passengers on board the MS Balmoral, that was travelling on the same route as the tragic Titanic did in 1912, got the shock of their lives as the captain told all passengers to don their life-jackets and head for the life-boats. "Could it be a rep...
Read full storySpanish monarch's grandson follows in King Juan-flew-over-the-cuckoo's-nest-Carlos' footsteps
Madrid - Thirteen year-old Felipe Juan Froilan is reported to have shot himself in the foot yesterday emulating his trigger-happy grandfather. The son of Intifada - er...Infanta! - Elena, eldest child of the King and Queen, and Jaime de Marichala...
Read full storyMitt Romney Favored to Win Boston Marathon
The $75 million Mitt Romney has spent on his presidential campaign appears to have more than paid off; polls now show that Romney is favored to win not only the Republican presidential nomination, but also the Boston Marathon. "I didn't even reali...
Read full storyManchester United Denied Penalty
There was a shock at Old Trafford on Sunday as Manchester United were denied a penalty after Ashley Young's blatant dive. After the match, Sir Alex "Cheating Wanker" Ferguson was incensed, saying "I haven't seen the replay but that was a certain pena...
Read full story"UnSafe2Drive" Text Alert Program Launch Delayed
Federal transportation officials have postponed the release of "UnSafe2Drive", a free downloadable cell phone app which would allow drivers to notify highway patrol officers of hazardous road conditions and accidents via text message. An adverti...
Read full storyFriday the 13th paranoia hits the Vatican
Rome - The Pope's private quarters had the full Bell, Book & Candle treatment today after minders found a red-haired voodoo doll stuffed inside a hidden crevice along with a handwritten billet-doux signed 'Love, Fidel'. Vatican exorcists fear...
Read full storyAlex Ferguson admits Manchester United's success is not down to him
Manchester United manager, Alex Ferguson has admitted that he is not responsible for the success of Manchester United this year. "It's nothing to do with me," he said. Actually, he said "E now tude wimmy" but a translator offered the correct pronu...
Read full storyThe Adventures of Ozzie and Fidel
Ricky Martin now has a big hit on Broadway with Evita, and Ozzie Guillen has another flop in Miami with the Marlins. Yes, the man whose mouth can barely form the right words in English went to Miami this year to manage a team where the franchise h...
Read full storyA Dawkins Victory?
Atheist fundamentalist and evolution crackpot Richard Dawkins took part in a debate with Cardinal George Pell in Sydney Australia, and by some accounts did an admiral job of out debating the cleric. Dawkins is famed for his outspoken views on reli...
Read full storyBruno Mars - "Run me over"
If you don't feel like doing anything today, you are not alone - even if you don't wish to 'hang loose' like global megastar Bruno Mars. However, if you are determined to do nothing and can afford to, you are subsequently unlikely to start catchin...
Read full storySuccession changes could see Cider the 1st on the throne
The Prime Minister David Cameron is said to have left Buckingham Palace this weekend looking like Beatrice, after it was disclosed that the next in line might not be human. The Queen is rumoured to be redrafting centuries old succession laws that...
Read full storyF1 Commentators face death penalty in China
Formula 1 commentators have been warned they face the death penalty this Sunday if the Chinese Grand Prix is not exciting. Travel documents have been requisitioned from TV crews already in Shanghai, leading other crews to cancel their trip and rel...
Read full storyWest Virginia Family Torn Apart by Son's Hobo Dreams
Pete and Lucinda Strait of Morgantown, West Virginia, were devastated when their six-year-old son, Jack, informed them that he plans to be a hobo when he grows up. The news came as a particular blow to Lucinda. For Jack's entire life, she's done her best to instill in her son a sense of ambition and a drive toward professional success. But thus far, it's all been for naught; Jack has no interes...
Read full storyThe manuscripts of John A Statusboast
Oh my gosh I am sooooo bored right now, and tired, isn't everybody tired. Click like if you have ever been tired, yeah that's how I roll. But you know I think I got to be so tired because I was so bored and then you know my mom's gone out with her new boyfriend Lorenzo and their all too not tired unlike me, who is tired! Anyway forget that because I have work in like 3 hours but that's ok because...
Read full storyMy week as a woman - day three
I was glad that I had the week off work for Easter. It was why my wife had chosen this week for my forfeit, but I knew full well that she would have insisted I go to work, and then checked up on me. For the whole week I would experience the pain of femininity on pain of pain. Believe me when I say that the pain of being a woman for one week can in no way compare to what my wife is capable of. O...
Read full storyPolitical Facebook - Newt Gingrich, Rick Santorum, Ron Paul, and Sarah Palin
POLITICAL FACEBOOK Newt Gingrich: Hi Rick. Well old pal it looks like I'm done. I don't have a snowballs chance in hell of beating "Old Mittens." 10:01 a.m. Rick Santorum: I hear you Newton. I am feeling the same way. I don't think I've been this disappointed since back in high school when I asked the head cheerleader, Sadie Sue Von Buttermilk to the prom and she told me that she wanted to...
Read full storyMiami Marlins Manager Ozzie Guillen Sticks His Baseball Cleats In His Mouth Once Again!
MIAMI - The manager of Major League Baseball's Miami Marlins, Ozzie Guillen has done gone and to quote Britney Spears "Oops...I Did It Again!" This time the native of Venezuela told some reporters that he really feels that former Cuban dictator Fi...
Read full storyThe Dallas Mavericks Put Lamar Odom of "Khloe and Lamar" Out To Pasture
DALLAS - The Dallas Mavericks organization has finally had enough of Mr. Lamar "LaLaLand" Odom and have placed him on the inactive list instead of outright releasing him. Mavericks owner Mark "Smiley" Cuban told Sherwood Frisbee with Sports Balls...
Read full storySaudi Princess Calls for Radical Changes (sort of)
In an interview with the BBC, Princess Abu Dabo called for major systemic changes in her country, but stopped short of suggesting anything that might result in her getting pelted to death with stones. As one of 900 children sired by Ibn Saud, th...
Read full storyA True Diary of Woe - Part Fifty-Four
A diary of one man's (Using the term lossely) utter failure, depression, frustration, cock-ups, and impecuniousness, starting in August 1947 Chapter 97: The Missing £20 The second and last time I was assigned to a CIT shift (Cash In Transit), was when I was at a factory in Lenton, Nottingham. They had a large amount of money (£12k) they wanted collecting from a bank in Nottingham's city...
Read full storyCheney's health fragile following transplant
WASHINGTON-- Former Vice President Dick Cheney was released from the hospital two weeks ago following his recent heart transplant, but his health remains in a fragile condition. Dick Cheney's history of heart problems has been widely reported. Ne...
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