
Congress Outsources job of "President Bush" to South Korea
In a move likely to send ripples throughout MSNBC the Senate today voted 97 to 3 to outsource President Bush's job as "President Bush" to an unemployed fisherman, Kyung-Soon Yong of Seoul South Korea.
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Iranian Scientists Explain Yellow Cake's Advantages
Tehran, Iran---In what they describe as a major scientific breakthrough, Iranian nuclear researchers have declared yellow cake to be good for you. "It is a mysterious, magical, mythical substance that has vitamins, minerals, nutrition and can be enr...
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World scientists split on divine issue
DUST BIN, Montana -- At a scientific conference in Montana, a student in the audience asked the distinguished panelists: "Can you be a good scientist and believe in God?"...
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French Accuse Cyclist of Doping
Paris -- The French cycling magazine LeCycliste today leveled doping charges at a famous American cyclist. In a cover piece, LeBike stated that George W. Bush, who recently cycled around his Crawford Texas ranch with TdF winner Lance Armstrong is &...
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Deadline for Iraqi Parliament Draws Near.
After another week of wrangling, Shi'ite and Kurdish groups have finally reached a draft agreement on exactly how the deck chairs should have been arranged on the Titanic.
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Animal type tests get renewed backing by mother-in-laws
The European league of evil mother-in-laws and mad dogs has given their backing to further animal type experiments on their son-in-laws. However, the British Association for the Advancement of Science (BA) has declared that the intense pain and suffe...
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Pat Robertson Goes to Hell for Threatening Hugo Chavez
VIRGINIA BEACH, Va (AP)--Viewers watching the 700 Club on TV were confounded on Tuesday when they witnessed TV evangelist Pat Robertson embraced by the Devil and carried bodily off to Hell because of his recent call for the United States Government t...
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Robertson's 'Killing For Christ' Nets KFC Lawsuit
MEMPHIS, TN-America's values have been cast into turmoil. Religion and nutrition are locked in moral and mortal combat, with the country's favorite fast food pitted against one of the nation's foremost evangelists.
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Bush says withdrawal from Middle East would mean bringing troops home
CRAWFORD, Texas -- President Bush said outside his Texas home that withdrawal from Iraq would mean the United States would take out all of its soldiers and that would not be good.
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Klum Klaims "Nothing Sexy about Pregnancy"
Oslo -- Supermodel Heidi Klum, appearing on the cover of Vitalis magazine, claimed there was "Nothing sexy about pregnancy." Appearing in a baby-doll sewn from white mosquito netting, her engorged bosom jutting provocatively and a string...
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