
Taliban Denies Effort to Escalate Tensions
KABUL, Afghanistan - Taliban leaders were questioned today concerning possible efforts by Taliban members to increase tension along the "hot" border between Pakistan and India.
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Bush Throws "Deliverance" Themed Iraq War Party
Washington, D.C. - United States President George W. Bush threw a party today in honour of the U.S. led war in Iraq.
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Logic: A Thing of the Past
After careful deliberation, the National Science Board decided logic is an outdated principle. As a result, it is expected that logic will be removed from all day-to-day applications. Logically, however, that is unlikely to occur.
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Will Polish Pull Out...of Iraq? (What were you thinking? Hmmmm)
Now, now. I am so tired of listening to all the sexual innuendo that is related to war terms. Pull out, rush in, attack, bomb and so forth. I mean, my poor ears have been molested with all of this harsh warlike sex talk. I think we need to use kinder, gentler, more moralistic terms to describe warfare. If not, we should consider censoring the news channels. I don't want my children hear...
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Donald Trump Takes Over Vatican: Tells Pope "You're Fired!"
Vatican City, Vatican -- The Catholic Church, due to failing membership amongst its disgruntled flock, has been taken over by New York based de...
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Bush Kills Kerry
Today at the first presidential debate of the 2004 election George 'the W stands for wallop' Bush took a swing at the democratic candidate John Kerry. The punch sent spit, teeth and blood flying from Kerry's mouth and seconds later he...
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Living on the Moon
Thomas Sckilarie of the Moon Inhabitation Corporation has recently been selling property on the Moon for celebrities to live on. Jennifer Aniston just purchased a 200 acre property last week. When I asked her about the investment, she had this to s...
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Old MacDonald had a Cow
Lima, Indiana- In a case of artificial insemination gone terribly awry, a dairy farmer in rural Indiana gave birth today to a Holstein calf. A neighbor described the incident as "horrific and somewhat unsettling."...
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Bush urges world to fight terrapins
US unelected President George "Big W" Bush has said there can be "no neutral ground in the fight between civilization and terrapins".
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"Scopes Trial" County Steps Up Enforcement
DAYTON, Tenn. - The county that has begun charging Homosexuals with "Crimes against nature" has a new axe to grind: Heterosexual "Crimes against nature".
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Gay Marriage Effort Gets Boost
LAS VEGAS, Nev. - The effort to legalize Gay marriages received a healthy boost this morning, as three large National Organizations threw their support behind the effort.
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