Incumbent Fifa Idiot in Chief Sepp Blatter took another step towards securing his already infamous reputation by expressing his desire for a "fair and free" Fifa election. Blatter, will stand unopposed at the Fifa congress in Zurich tomorrow. "All...
Discord over the future of the Middle East Peace Process continued this morning after President Obama confirmed he would not endorse a proposal which would see Israel return to the borders marked in 1100 BC by the first Jewish settlers. According...
In a shocking announcement today, it was confirmed that the Lord Chief Justice of England and Wales would be asking all Members of Parliament to now follow the laws of the Nation. MP's have famously been exempt from being answerable to the law sin...
Sir Alex Ferguson admitted in a press conference today that he had suspicions over the timing and motives of the U.S raid that killed Osama Bin Laden earlier this month. "For almost a decade this man has been on the run, yet for some reason he cou...
More than two weeks after the death of infamous terrorist Osama Bin Laden, details continue to emerge about the circumstances of his fatal shooting. Bin Laden, who was alleged to have been unarmed at the time of his death, had believed the landing...
There was pandemonium at 10 Downing Street today, as one of the Nations largest and most influential Unions threatened to take strike action. In doing so they would leave the public without spoof news for an indefinite period of time. A source wit...
The footballing world was brought to a near standstill today, as rookie journalist Anthony Abdul Gonzales dared ask a question that is seldom ever talked about. Why do rival football fans hate each other? Interviewing a special panel of supporters...
Notorious, cave-dwelling villain Osama Bin Laden has broken a long silence to express his fury over "Jedward" beating his personal favourite, Lucie Jones, to stay in X-factor. "This is what happens when you give everybody the right to vote. Jedwar...
David N'Gog and Rafa Benitez have finally spoken out on last nights diving debacle against Birmingham City. Liverpool's young French foward has claimed there is a conspiracy against him. "There were 45,000 fans there, and viewers from across th...
In an ever more desperate attempt to ease post-colonial guilt and show the magnanimous virtues of free society, a vote will come before the Commons today on whether honour killings should be legalized. Nick Griffin, happy to speak on the behalf o...
An animal charity has stepped in to prevent what could have possibly ended in the murder of two male Pit Bull Terriers, found at a council estate in Mersyside. It is believed the dogs were owned by neighbours and members of fascist group, "Ain't...
Iranian President, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad gave a greater insight today into the reasons behind Iran's nuclear programme. "We are shocked and appalled at the idea that people suspect us of trying to create a Nuclear Missile. We would consider somethin...
The LAPD continued to make a mockery of law enforcement this week, in their latest ill-fated investigation into the murder of Rap Legend Biggie Smalls. Long after closing the initial case, a junior officer stumbled across "Rap Beef" volumes one to...
Liverpool pretty boy Fernando Torres has responded to remarks made by Didier Drogba, that come May the two will be very close at the top of the scoring charts. While Torres refused to deny this, he had a wholly different system of determining who is...
Footballs Governing bodies are considering plans to make drastic alterations to footballing rules, in an attempt to make it as exciting, modern and profitable as it has ever been. Ideas that have been mooted include having substitute referees, tha...
Arsenal Manager Arsene Wenger has refuted suggestions that his teams failure to capture a trophy in almost five years is a direct result of the sale of all of his best players. "I do not think this was a wrong move. Not winning a trophy in this lo...
Arsenal Coach Arsene Wenger was full of praise for his players and club, ahead of his teams weekend fixture at Wolves. "Just because I say Van Persie is the best striker in the premiership at the moment, does not mean all our other players aren't...
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