This is almost a real letter received at the DIY SOS team HQ. Dear DIY SOS, I hope you can help me. My name is Jane Hunt and I have a useless husband called Mike. I have a really simple job that desperately needs doing and I'm afraid that my man is not quite up to the task. Therefore I need your help. Almost a year ago I purchased a nice bedroom dresser from MFI during their closing down...
Beleaguered Downing Street staffers today promised an immediate (or as soon as we can get around to it) inquiry into the circumstances surrounding the almost legendary "Mystery Blonde" who is on the verge of attaining legendary status. Following t...
The mystery blonde woman, who has been the subject of so much press speculation all over the world in the past month or so, has apparently been sighted heading towards Silverstone, ahead of tomorrow's F1 British Grand Prix. London man, Tommy Sherm...
There was some confusion today among commuters arriving at Basingstoke Station, as they found themselves confronted by a mystery blonde woman in the ticket hall, acting strangely. The woman, suspected to be the mystery blonde who has recently been...
Unconfirmed reports are presently indicating that the mysterious mystery blonde woman, last seen walking across a car park at Portsmouth Ferry Port, has just been seen at Aldi's on West Street, in Fareham, Hants. One Aldi customer swore that the w...
The mystery blonde woman who has been spotted all over the world in the past month, was apparently spotted on board a cross channel ferry, sailing from Cherbourg to Portsmouth last night. Several witnesses reported seeing the blonde woman in the b...
The jurors only had to deliberate for ten hours to bring in a decision in the Casey Anderson murder trial. A decision that stunned case watchers. The verdict, not guilty. Mommies and Grandmothers were aghast by the decision the jury came to. M...
It's official. New research carried out by Professor Donny Gall of the Irish institute for mind studies has shown vast differences between men and women. Using a newly developed high definition head scanner Professor Gall can, for the first time s...
In an interview, Dominique Strauss-Kahn revealed that 80 percent of cases where men and women are in conflict with each other, women lie about men to demonstrate they have power. Most women lie about men to make financial gains. The legal battle...
DISCOVERY Dear Sir, I wonder if any of your readers can settle an argument? Only, my husband and I were having a discussion the other day about the end of the world. He reckons it will happen either when the sun finally goes nova, turns into a red giant and swallows the earth up, or when we get hit by a giant asteroid. I reckon it'll end when we get overrun with vampires and zombies, which w...
Who is the most ugliest woman in the world? Hollywood would have presented her to us. Maya Angelou, Beyonce Knowles or perhaps Pearl Bailey. Who could it be? Correspondent Andy Jackson reports the woman who currently holds the title, at least acc...
Eric Nonce, a retired Maths teacher from Dorking, has put his high IQ to good use. He has predicted every Ladies Champion at the Wimbledon Tennis Tournament since 1969. Mr Nonce, who operates from a shed in Dorking, consults Tide Tables to analyse...
The Zetas Cartel set a massive wildfire which forced evacuations from towns in the eastern part of Arizona and threatened society with flames. The flames were so massive they pushed towards New Mexico. Los Zetas Cartel are a group of highly traine...
The Mayo Cllinic has released the results of a five year study on the effects of Viagra tablets on women. The study verified the effects to the body of women who took the drug orally, not of women whose male partners took the drug. The study was fund...
Rochester, Minnesota: In a study from the famed Institute For Gender Brain Analysis, a sample of over 500,000 women proves that they lack the MP3 gene. Known in genetic research circles as the "Monty Python" genetic marker, science finally has...
HOLLYWOOD - This year's Bachelor finale was filmed in beautiful South Africa, but the producers may just have thrown away their money and are probably now wishing they had filmed it in La Brea or La Habra instead. Many felt that Brad Womack was go...
Apple CEO, Steve Jobs admits that the future of iPads lies squarely with females. "When it comes to thin, yet highly absorbent, women want it." Jobs is talking about the new iPad 2 design which is 33 percent thinner than the original iPad and is...
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