Top economists at the U.S. Mint are urging the house and senate to discontinue the iconic T-shirt. "T-shirts costs vary wildly. Anywhere from 5 to 25 dollars per unit, and have Zero value, less than a cent!" comments Randy Zublowski spokesman for th...
Washington DC: White House Press Secretary Jay Carney announced that President Obama has asked Congress not to pursue an assault weapons ban, but instead work on Glove Control legislation. Many conservative Democrats and Republicans have a hard ti...
Like a crazed lumberjack on a 10 day drunken spree holding a axe to a felled tree and threatening to chop off its branches if he doesn't get what he desires, the Republicans of the US Congress have told President Obama they will not only shut down th...
Hollywood - Faced with the lowest approval rating in the history of approval ratings, the United States Congress plans to promote itself with a television ad produced specifically to run during the Super Bowl. "Everybody keeps making fun of us," c...
Washington DC - Americans may soon be using their smart phones to force the Federal government to be more sensitive to their needs and opinions. The new, higher level of democracy comes thanks to a recently introduced iPhone app, called Voter A...
Senator Chris Coons' office has sent out a short brief detailing how the Congressman has finally found God, and put an end to a millennia-long game of hide and seek. Asked to comment about his Earth-shaking discovery, Senator Coons had this to say...
Facebook vigilante, Bobby D. Foster's has struck yet another Senator. The unprovoked Facebook comment reads as follows: Dear Senator Manchin, I just wanted to inform you that I am quite disappointed that your chin is not as manly as you name suggests. Have a nice day. -BDF The Senator has reportedly not shown up to a single congressional session since he read the post last Thursday.
Tennessee Senator Lamar Alexander has reportedly suffered a mildly harassing comment on his official Facebook profile. The offending remark was in response to an article the Senator posted which warned against the dangers of the looming fiscal cliff.
Freshmen U.S. Senator Marco Rubio has reportedly suffered a mildly harassing comment on his official Facebook profile. The offending remark was in response to an article the Senator posted which claimed, "Rubio slams Obama, Biden on economy." The...
A bill explicitly stating that citizens will be allocated 1 second of free speech for every $10,000 of pre-taxable income they earn per year has made its way through the Senate subcommittee process. The following is a transcript of the final hearing. 2012 A BILL TO CODIFY, GUARD, AND BOLSTER FREE SPEECH RIGHTS IN THE UNITED STATES HEARING BEFORE THE SUBCOMMITTEE ON THE CONSTITUTION,...
Washington DC -- A group of activists, academics and other concerned citizens is calling for the creation of a cabinet-level "Department of Common Sense" to improve the quality of decision-making in the nation's capital. "America is in near crisis...
Washington DC - Under mounting pressure to disclose more details about the government's Fast and Furious gun-running fiasco, Attorney General Eric Holder revealed today that the effort failed because a "drug tracking" component of the operation was n...
Wisconsin congressman and union buster Paul Ryan has apparently skipped town amid rumors that nuns angered by statements he made about Catholicism were headed to his office. "We haven't seen him since last week," a congressional office staffer who...
Baltimore, Maryland - Dr. Hunson Bunnneydew, MD, D.O., J.D, Director of Immunological Studies And Tranny Repair with a shiny head and no tattoo, plans to release the full study: "Treats of the Impact of Organic Absences on Choice and Treats Of t...
House Speaker John Boehner (R-OH) will be going through an experimental surgery next week. The procedure, developed by Dr. Spina Bifida, will implant a cybernetic spine into the Speaker of The House. The procedure is expected to last 5 hours and w...
WashingtonDC. - The House Ethics Committee opened hearings today to bring to light allegations that House and Senate staff members have been physically and mentally abusing Capitol Hill lobbyist following the disclosure that a member of Senator Paul...
WASHINGTON, D.C. (AP Newsliar) -- The U.S. Congressional Booster Club, run by the mothers of currently sitting U.S. representatives and senators, has raised $1400 in funding towards the purchase of new ties. "Many of our little darlings are still...
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