Rosco Jennings has been told he is not smart since he was 5 years old. Now in his 30's Jennings faces ridicule from friends and family each day he uses his "smart phone" "Everyone always says, hey it's pretty ironic that an idiot like you is usin...
A Dorset man was said to be 'beside himself' today after suffering a massive personal loss, after a horrific accident. The accident occurred last night, at about 10:30pm in his local public house. Gesticulating wildly whilst telling a rather slurr...
A recent survey, the biggest of its kind, has found that using hand held mobile devices to make calls can lead to the agonising symptoms of Tinnitus. The debilitating condition of ringing in the ears has left many people deaf with thousands of oth...
Fresh from proving that butterflies are incapable of flight due to their wind rigidity being far too low, Valdimar Procrastinov has turned his attention to mobile phones and trains, proving beyond doubt that mobile phones cannot work on a moving trai...
Telecom giant Vodacomm has asked Raoul Moat to pay for his monthly contract or they will cut him off. A spokesperson for Vodacomm said "press 1 for payg, press 2 for monthly contract or press 3 to speak to someone in India." Newcastle steroid usin...
Instant riches have been bestowed upon Freedom From Cellular Company, the inventor of the new, anti-cell phone jamming device called "The Silencer". This fresh creation shuts down any irritating cell phones in the users vicinity making them inoperabl...
There has been a shocking find from a multi-year study of children whose mothers lived close to a cell phone tower while pregnant, and health insurers, personal injury attorneys and telecom giants are scrabmling to decipher the results and exploit th...
(KRS NEWS) Thursday, Nokia unveiled their newest product response to the rapid gains in market share by Apple's iPhone and Sprint's newest 4G EVO model introductions. Introduced to a frenzied and feverish cabal of tech media reporters, Nokia lasc...
Motorola co-Chief Executive Sanjay Jha has said he has "never been a great believer" in demand for video. Fortunately for him, Motorola's next Droid and 2GHz smartphones for Christmas will not be able to handle the task. "There is not a big demand...
RamJac Inc., a lesser known player in the cell phone industry, announced Monday that it would be introducing a new line of suppository cell phones. Placed in the rectum, the new phones have a dual use on both the business as well as medical front.
Liza Colburn uses her cellphone constantly. She taps out her grocery lists, records voice memos (e.g. walk Fido, break up with that loser Frank), listens to music at the gym, tracks her caloric intake and posts frequent updates to her Twitter and Fa...
Microsoft is trying to boost its mobile phone sales by developing phones for babies. The new phone, called the Cryphone has been developed so that babies will be able to communicate with their parents far more easily. The phone will use brand new...
(Landline telephone is ringing in a hall. Sound of radio and crockery being washed coming from kitchen. Occupant of house eventually comes through to answer phone.) Hello?....... Hello?....... Hello, who's there? Hello? Hello? Hello, is that... Hello? Hello, could I speak to Mr Harrison please? Er yes, that's me. Mr Ivan Harrison? Yes, I'm Mr Harrison. Good evening Mr...
The latest craze to hit the cricket world is a new cell phone designed especially for the sports lover. This reporter got an early look at a new cell phone design and am happy to give a superior bang on rating. The next time you see a googly move...
Scientists in Sweden have discovered a direct correlation between the desirability of a mobile (cell) phone and their destructibility. In other words, the more desirable a phone is, the more easily it is destroyed, whilst the converse is true, and...
Shamed and jailed ex top cop Ali Dizaei has been has been found by prison authorities to have a first generation Motorola Brick Phone lodged in his bottom. Jailed Criminal in Uniform Dizaei, was caught by vigilant prison officers, when he queued to r...
The city of Las Cruces, New Mexico has banned the usage of cell phones while driving. Holding a cell phone and speaking into it will not be permitted, and neither will sending or receiving text messages. Using a hands free device and speaking with a hands free device, however, is still permissable. Offenders will receive a ticket for any offense of driving while using a cell phone, unless the...
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