Katherine (Kate) Doonswan woke up on Saturday morning, made herself a cup of coffee and decided to check her e-mails. When she saw that she had a message on her Facebook wall from her daughter Serena, who was away at summer camp, she was surprised. "...
After a recent report from two former Chiefs of Staff, retired Generals that American youths were becoming too fat to fight, both John Shalikashvili and Hugh Shelton had the shit beat out of them by two 300-pound 18-year-olds yesterday. Although t...
Two retired generals, John Shalikashvili and Hugh Shelton, have said that overweight American teenagers are the greatest threat to the nation's future security. "Some of our kids are so fat their only military use would be as something to roll dow...
Donna, the sophomore who wears bangs to cover up her zitty forehead, got another zit today, except this time it wasn't on her forehead as usual, it was on her butt! Horrified, the crafty teenager put some Nozema on her butt on Tuesday night. That...
Following the release of the latest annual increase in pre-teen and teenage pregnancies, Les Byon, spokeswoman for the Teenage Pregnancy Reduction Unit blamed Gordon Brown for the increase. "It's his fault.", Ms Byon said, "He got them pregnant.
The Conservatives have put forth a proposal to solve the problems many small businesses face when employing 'young adults', or teenagers as we used to call them. Many employers face huge financial losses when lazy, disinterested and bored young st...
A large box of popcorn sells for about $5.00 in Israel theatres. Carmel Shama, an Israeli lawmaker, thinks that this is outrageous because it is delaying puberty rites for Jewish children who cannot afford to pay this exorbitant price. It is cu...
A school board has come under attack by the religious organization, Christians Against Sex, CAS, for its approach to dealing with the high rate of pregnancies in the district. In their board meeting of February 15th 2010 it was noted that 20 stu...
Teenagers today have many flash-in-the-pan ideas that last a few weeks. Most of these are not impactful, at least not on the general population. However, the newest trend has people across the country groaning, cursing and refusing to leave their hom...
The backseat of the Lincoln Town Car has been voted as the favorite by a group of unwed, teenaged mothers (and mothers-to-be). The young women, aged 13 to 17, said that they found this vehicle's backseat to be "the roomiest, with the nicest upholste...
POTTSVILLE, Pa. - Illegal immigrant Luis Ramirez groped a girl in the park and was beaten by two teenagers who tried to save the girl. Ramirez died in the fight and the jury acquitted the teens who came to the aid of the girl. The jury found the...
Santa Fe, New Mexico - Dirk Johnson, 16, and known to his friends and himself as a "bad boy", spends most of his time giving grief to a local mall security guard. Dirk is blissfully unaware of his fate. Dirk does rather poorly in school, mainly f...
Lincoln, Nebraska - It is now hour five, and suburban boy Phillip Reardon is starting to think that the drug dealer he met may not be coming back. It started when Phil and some of his friends decided that they wanted to try some weed, like his old...
Hollywood, California - Emma Watson is making a serious bid for the much sought Milano award this year. The Milano is given out each year to the television star that is regarded as most able to inspire masturbation in males of all ages. Past winn...
Birmingham, England - Four teenage boys have appeared in the High Court in London charged with incitement to racial hatred, conspiracy to commit murder, and offenses under the Prevention of Terrorism Act. The case has been brought by prosecutors afte...
Okay, he's sixteen and he's relentlessly hounding me that he needs a car and his freedom and everyone else has one (and you know the story if you have ever been a parent of a teenager). He's also a pretty good kid and it would help out the transportation system at our house (and buy me a little extra sleep). So, ....I had to go talk to used car salesman. Other than politicians, reporters, ped...
Des Moines,Ia-State officials have once again warned grocers not to feed Teenagers after a ravenous youth went wild and destroyed a supermarket overnight in Sioux City. The incident at Phipp's Shop and Chop wasn't discovered until Manager Greg Phi...
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