The owner of a pony who tried to board a train at Wrexham General railway station yesterday, claims that the animal has never before travelled by train, and much prefers going by bus. Dai Boony, 51, was taking his pony, Trigger, for a day out to C...
In this age of political correctness and lack of patience for one's fellow man, things seem to have dipped to a new low. Barry Ludlow, 37, a high ranking executive in a city firm, was unceremoniously removed from a train on his way to work last Mo...
A 21 year old woman has appeared at Gravesend magistrates' court accused of having sex with five teenage boys close to the tracks at Abbey Wood, South London. Three of the boys were also present, but the other two managed to elude the police and...
The First Bus and Trains group who er, run buses and trains have decided to sponsor the next Grand National at Aintree in Liverpool. Commenting on their decision, a director of the transport form said "they were sponsoring the next Grand National...
It's just been announced that local man, Martin Shuttlecock, survived a terrifying ordeal on the morning of the 13th of January on his way to work. He hasn't made the story public until now, because it was quite traumatic, and because in his own words, he feels "a bit of a twat." The details of events leading up to the incident are quite complex, but Shuttlecock attempted to condense and presen...
Richard Branson has introduced a new service for his rail company. Rolling out the red carpet at Euston station last night, Mr Branson gathered gave us this statement. "The new service if for passengers travelling to Europe and long haul journe...
In a week when it was feared that The Local News would have to close its doors for the last time, the situation was dramatically saved when local man Kevin Smally casually mentioned in passing that he had spotted the 12.32 from Rochester yesterday and that it was 3 minutes late! "I had been looking out of my window at the railway line when I saw the train pass" said the dynamic senior citizen.
Local man, Martin Shuttlecock, was today recovering at home following a harrowing ordeal as he prepared for the Christmas holiday from work by arranging for a colleague to drop him off at a station close to his workplace after his final day at work,...
It is today learnt that a Tube Worker, a Mr. Chia Li Peng, originally from Malaysia, was summarily dismissed after his supervisor caught him masturbating behind the ticket window. Peng was assigned to Booking Office duties yesterday, 19th December...
Kansas Governor Moe Grain announced today the beginning of construction of a 350 mile per hour Bullet train that will run the breadth of Kansas from the state capitol in the east, Topeka, all the way to the Colorado border in the west. Citing a de...
A remarkable tale of survival against all the odds has emerged, amidst the absolute chaos that the UK's transport network has descended into. A local man, Arthur Crapper, has been found sitting in the waiting room of the snowbound railway station,...
Sub-zero freezing temperatures ground Britain's railways to a halt as the Siberian winter increased it's grip on an already frigid country. Despite the north of England having suffered and struggled on for over a week, once the Arctic weather hit the...
The Department for Transport has planned for Disasters after 2014, when trains will be so packed with passengers there will be large numbers of dead. 'This is our contribution to solving the Pensions crisis' announced David Squeeze, top Transport...
Rail passengers in England and Wales face 'substantial increases in already unacceptable overcrowding levels' by 2014 and should learn to accept the fact, a report by MPs says. The report suggests that the Department for Transport had 'lost' plans...
Her Royal Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II may have used a public service train to get to Portsmouth this weekend to see her little metal lover Lord Ark Royal of The Solent; but she was in for a shock when returning after a royal faux pas by one of the ro...
A video that has gone viral in the last day shows, from an engineer's point of view, a commuter train travelling at 75-85 MPH, colliding full-force with a herd of cows attempting to cross the tracks. At least six of the bovine interlopers were imm...
Prince Charles is touring the country in a train that runs on biofuel in an attempt to educate the country for a green future. The train runs on carbon neutral ligneous cellulose grown on wasteland, producing as much carbon dioxide as was taken up...
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