A local man, Dick Hertz, was mauled by a rescued research monkey Saturday night around 11pm at the local topless dance club known as Sexxxy Sadie's. Apparently, Mr. Hertz was embroiled in a verbal confrontation with Bambi, one of the dancers, when...
On the day that students once again took to the streets of Britain to complain about escalating tuition fees and broken government promises, thousands ignored them and headed off to Trafalgar Square to cheer on a group of fifteen hundred striking pol...
Following years of unreported but serious workplace related injuries in adult entertainment establishments, a London engineer today announced his new design for a textured, no-slip stripper pole. In a news conference earlier this morning, Howie Og...
I know I can get you riled up by taking my clothes off, one silky piece at a time, slowly but with a purpose. Now I'd like to see you get hot and bothered while I put them back on. Because I spent a long time picking out these clothes. I didn't just go to Macy's and grab the first thing that fit me; I looked at hundreds of pieces, in several different departments, before I found just what to take...
DETROIT - The little girl who wants to be a big girl real bad and her new friend Taylor Lautner were reportedly in Detroit, aka MoTown hanging out and letting it all hang out. Miley who has pole danced, lap danced, and gone knicker-less in the pas...
The Government has today announced important changes to the National Curriculum, with regards to schools in England and Wales. Perhaps the most startling revelation is that 'pole-dancing' and 'lap-dancing' are to be incorporated within the curricu...
BAKERSFIELD, California - Hide and Seek Productions in association with Simon Cowell's 19th Hole Productions has announced a new situation comedy which will have its premier in early August. The show will star Pamela Anderson, Heather Locklear, an...
After two spectacular financial failures, it seem the third time was the charm as the "New Oasis Bar', a Spoof Collaboration of demented writers, hit the jack pot with their theme of Tits, Tits and More Tits...and a wee bit of Arse! According to p...
Mimi Le Boeuf 49, real name Sandra Flisspap of Newington Butts claimed that the famous - and fabulously wealthy - Chelsea duo were "stupid jerks" when it came down to selecting partners with whom to conduct extra-marital dalliances, and that their ch...
WARSAW, Poland - Saturday night was a hot August night, and Warsaw was hopping and bopping to a Material Girl's concert, and, to top it all off, it was the eve of Madonna's 51st birthday, too. One other, minor Madonna was also being celebrated o...
Deliverance, Arkansas - Pole dancing is often the only means of upward mobility for trailer park residents, but now with the Miley Cyrus "Pole Dancing Toy Set for Tweens", Hillbillies will finally have a leg up on the competition: inner-city kids fro...
Democratic Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi of California made the mistake of giving away all of her tickets to the Inagural Parade and did not save any for herself. In a move speaking of her enterprising and inventive nature, however, Pelosi decid...
"Its the only way I can descend stairs!" declared the president in waiting (in bullet-proofed waiting, actually). His wife Michelle, said angrily "I cant believe you would resort to publishing hurtful stories about my family and their moving from...
Hollywood, California - A recent study on the health benefits of pole dancing has concluded that women practicing the vertical boogie-woogie do not derive their over inflated false sense of self-worth from men leering at their exposed bodies or from...
Nintendo have launched a new title for their family-friendly Wii console 'Po-Po Electro Pole Dancer Xtreme' which recreates what it is like to be a Pole Dancer.
London - (Unbelievably Tacky Mess): High Street retailer Woolworths is said to be stunned at the barrage of criticism levelled at its top loss-leading under-12s' pole dancing equipment marketed under the Lolita range.
The truth about the mystery of crop circles is out. For we can reveal that they have nothing to do with extra-terrestrial visitors but more to do with a group of pole dancers from Gloucester.
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