London - (Big Money Balls Mess): A prominent government front bencher has been outed as the secret winner of last week's £113 million lottery draw. The anonymous MP - previously an all-party House of Commons adviser on the lottery - is said to be...
As the day of reckoning approaches for the Coalition, it is reported that Prison Governors fear that their prisons may be emptied. With October 20th, aka "Big Cut day, vive the Big Society" the blackest day for the ordinary UK citizen since their...
London - (Feline Mess): Shadow chancellor Alan Johnson has slammed LibDem/Con coalition pussies now resident in Downing Street as far worse than Mrs Thatcher's. Launching a scathing tirade against the Cameron/Clegg regime Johnson said former No 10...
Foreign Secretary William Hague has today issued a statement refuting rumours that he is a secret Mormon Elder' There is no truth whatsoever in these scurrilous rumours' he told reporters. 'I admit that over the last few months I have regularly share...
Plans by Education Secretary Michael Gove to allow headmasters to discipline pupils "any time, any place, anywhere" face derision. He told the Tory party conference: "At the moment heads are prevented from dealing with their pupils if they run wil...
I had this dream about the Tory Conference. George Osborne alienated his core voters and the Daily Mail had apoplexy. Cameron apologised for the gigantic cock up and said sorry for the atrocious mathematics, but it was all because of the mess left by Labour. Boris tried to get the limelight and failed. Warring factions threatened to cause problems. LibDems complained they didn't know about the...
Baroness, "not wishy washy but bossy", alleges that 3 Labour MP's were elected because of electoral fraud. The Baroness, has not however, substantiated the allegations with real evidence. Strangely, she cancelled an appearance on Question Time, be...
Birmingham - (Bottoms Up News): "Personally, I blame this newfangled LibDem austerity malarkey for seeping into the Party spirit," one disgruntled Conference delegate grumbled today. And complain he might. The cancellation of the annual 'Gatec...
Following the Liberal Democrat Conference, which has now faded from memory, and the Labour Conference which elected a new left of centre leader, David Cameron is preparing for an exciting Conservative Conference. Unfortunately the whole Conference...
The U.K's coalition government are set to release a 2011 sexy calendar, sources say. The photo shoot has already begun, with sessions taking place in Hyde Park and the Houses Of Parliament. Exact details of the pictures are being closely guarde...
On the same day that his Party Conference voted to throw out the Coalition's flagship, Education Policy, Nick Clegg was reduced to begging his Party to get behind him, it is reported. This is the man who is so attached to Cameron by a dog lead tha...
Quelle surprise! All the Free Schools are in London - As expected, fee paying schools have jumped in first, grabbed Gove's attention and set themselves up to be even further subsidised by the less fortunate. Sons and daughters of the already filthy r...
The Tory government is reeling from yet another sex scandal following publication of allegations on an Internet blog that one of its Ministers is heterosexual. The unnamed Minister was seen talking to and holding hands with a woman. He is said to...
Although not exactly a big surprise given his name (99% of public school toffs with twats names like Crispin, Tarquin etc. are surely gay), a medium surprise given the fact he was educated at Sandhurst Military School or indeed even a tiny little sur...
London - (Tory Bora Mess): The renegades were reported tonight as completely surrounded by an elite NATO crack team whose orders are to squeeze them out of the pockets of the Russian mafia. Operation Tory She's Adder-Few sees troops from the Ulti...
On a TV reality show, masquerading as the definitive account of the "5 days that changed British Politics", how many of us could C. Nick Clegg, wriggling and definitely not giggling, as he was questioned about his unholy alliance with Call me Dave?...
Call me Dave has had a torrid time in the US. The poor guy must be really exhausted after weeks spent turning the UK upside down and back again. It must have been exhaustion that made him, mistakenly, bring the USA into WW2 a year before they ac...
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