Geneva, Switzerland - As World Health Organization officials announce a Swine Flu pandemic, their underlings are mounting a furious call for an influx of cash. Many see it as a good reason to upgrade their offices and facilities. The last world pande...
Washington, D.C. - 89 year-old white supremist, James Von Brunn, today shot and killed a security guard at the Holocaust Museum in the capitol. Initial reports indicate that it was a random act of a deranged gunman who, after carrying years of hate t...
London, UK - Britney Spears and Madonna announced today their plan to open an autoerotic sex clinic in London. The clinic is to be called "Carradine's". Banking on their names as hot, sex-driven celebrities, the two have each invested over $1 mil...
London, UK - As the result of a failed cooking show outside parliament featuring chef Jamie Oliver and vegetarian advocate Heather Mills-McCartney, BNP leader Nick Griffin pelted with eggs outside Parliament, having been caught in the crossfire betwe...
Washington, DC - The office of Homeland Security issues the following directive to states bordering on Canada. FACT: Geese originating from Canada caused the near disaster of flight US Airways 1549. FACT: The border of Canada and the U.S. is po...
New York - A millionaire philanthropist, Johnstone Harriman III, has been found dead in his stretched limousine, five days after his chauffeur walked away for a cigarette and some take-out food. The chauffeur, Lance Butterworth, succumbed to food poi...
Buckingham Palace - 'er family haven deserted 'er fer the Dee-Doy weekend and haven been uninvited t' official services in France, Queen Elizabeth commemorated the occasion of the 65th Anniversary of t' Dee-Doy landing, alone by 'erself at palace.
Recife, Brazil - Combined Brazilian and French search forces have been hampered in their efforts to find evidence of a downed Air France flight and authorities cite two reasons. Firstly, extensive debris fields on the Atlantic have made it impossi...
West Lothian, UK - West Lothian, the town that nutured Susan Boyle through childhood to the point where she became an international singing sensation and Britain's Got Talent celebutant, is very proud of her. But they're also getting ready to evict h...
Bangkok, Thailand - Sources reveal that David Carradine's alleged death by auto-erotic asphyxiation was actually an audition for a new celebrity reality t.v. show to be sponsored by a leading sexual performance drug manufacturer. The series, tenta...
Atlantic Ocean - Mysteriously today, the searchers for the downed Air France flight 447 Airbus 330 came across a man drifitng aimlessly on top of a sack filled with coconuts. Although in obvious poor health but with a good tan, the man, Henri Crut...
RIYADH, Saudi Arabia- President Obama arrived in at da Royal airpo't in Riyadh, Saudah' Arabia at around 2:20pm local time today. Da visit to Saudah' Arabia was a last minute addition to da schedule, ahead uh his heavily anticipated speech in Cai...
Washington, DC - It has been revealed by credible sources within the U.S. Department of Agriculture that U.S. Treasury Secretary, Tim Geithner, the man responsible for the nations finance and monetary matters, has applied for food stamps - the progra...
BEIJING- Once again the communist leaders in China are flexing their muscles and this time they are going after a specific type of dissident; people that write for 'The Spoof'- a website parody tabloid where writers take everyday news stories and tur...
BUCKINGHAM PALACE, London - HRH Prince Philip has rendered his opinion on the talent show, Britain's Got Talent, and he thinks it blows. Speaking for the first time to the media regarding BGT, Prince Philip says he is shocked at the attention a s...
WASHINGTON, DC - There was some cause for concern today amongst world bankers, or at least world bankers that were still employed, as Barack Obama reportedly tapped Lulu, Scottish born singer-songwriter, actress, model and television personality, to...
Kim Jong-il's third son, Kim Jong Yung-un is to become North Korea's next leader. Born in the early 1980's, Yung-un was not thought to fit the mold of the average communist dictator slash tyrant. "Actually if you think of it in American terms, ou...
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