SAN ANTONIO – (Satire News) – The Toyota Corporation has just developed the new, state-of-the-art military Patton 17 Tank Cycle X. The new military war machine was tested out recently in Iran against Isis soldiers who ran for the hills (or rather…
Tokyo, Japan - The Toyota Motor Corporation unleashed a new commercial today, marketed towards Authoritarian regimes and Dictators around the globe. The commercial plays heavily on the recent success of the Taliban in Afghanistan. A victory that c…
LOS ANGELES - A representative for Japan's Toyota Auto Industry has just let the news media know that they will soon be opening up a brand new Toyota plant in Tijuana, Baja California (Mexico). Yoshiro Yasukawa stated that Toyota is proud of the n...
Venice, California - Japan's 2011 tsunami has brought yet another surprise to American shores. A Toyota dealership, complete with a sales staff and a service dapartment, has landed on the beach here, less than a week after a Japanese fishing doc...
WASHINGTON-Toyota Motor Corp. said Tuesday it will recall 4.2 million vehicles in the United States, the company's largest-ever U.S. recall, to address problems with normal-sized cup holders that could result in oversized drinks spilling and lead...
BRUSSELS, Belgium--Just as orders for the white Ford Bronco skyrocketed after O.J. Simpson tried to flee the police in 1994, yet another raging lunatic has driven up the sales of a vehicle. Footage of the Toyota 4x4 went viral this week as Libyan...
SAN FRANCISCO - Spokespersons for the three giant Japanese auto makers Toyota, Nissan, and Honda have all announced that they have circulated memorandums to each other stating that they have made entries to their individual data bases regarding two A...
The resilient British motor industry received yet another BOOST with the recall of billions of Toyotas, government figures revealed today. Cars manufactured in the UK before they became part of China's Nanjing Automobile company in 2005 have NEVER BE...
Johnny Pluto, head of big rockets at NASA today unceremoniously sacked Toyota. Riding on the crest of a wave some 6 years ago they were tasked with designing a ship to take man to Mars, but the dream is now over. Mr Pluto said "They simply can't...
After their success in defeating Google, the Chinese Hackers Society (CHS) has turned its attention to Japan. Since they discovered that the new Toyotas use wireless throttle control, they are now hacking the control systems of the Toyotas, and ar...
Over 5 million toy Yodas have been recalled world wide amid safety fears. The effect is likely to be disastrous on the replica Star Wars market, which has only just recovered from the exploding Han Solo fiasco. The Yoda dolls were supposed to make...
After receiving over one hundred complaints, Toyota is having to announce still another recall, this time of their ceiling fans. "I love my ceiling fan as it can provide a gentle breeze in the summer with the air conditioner on low. It's simply pe...
Unless you have been dead or living in a cave, you have been watching the Winter Olympics. If you have any brains, you have been DVRing them and therefore have avoided many of the advertisements that make up about half of the coverage of the Winter...
Beleaguered auto manufacturer Toyota may be in store for consumer lawsuits based on loss of value after Kelley Blue Book, a leading used-car value service, lowered its estimated resale prices for the recalled models by 2.5% to 3.5%. The resulting...
Popular children's character, Noddy, was involved in a fatal car crash this morning. His passenger and life long friend, Big Ears, was pronounced dead on the scene; whilst Noddy himself has been taken to Toy Town hospital and remains in critical cond...
IN A NOVEL MOVE to speed repairs and restore consumer confidence, engineers have designed a low tech fix for the high tech problems in Toyota's electronic acceleration and braking systems that have plagued over 8 million of its vehicles. "We call...
It was announced late yesterday that as long as horny Americans continue to have sex in the front seat of their cars, there is nothing which can be done to alleviate the stuck pedal problem - they will simply continue to get stuck with gizzum. Eig...
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