I got up at halftime and went into the bathroom to make room for some more beer. When I came out my wife said, "Did you wash your hands?" I said, "No. Why make such a big deal about it?"
"Well, you went to the bathroom, your hands are dirty," she complained, "Go back and wash them!"
"I don't know what you're complaining about, I didn't touch anything in there you haven't had in your mouth!"
I slept on the couch that night.
