How to Outrun a Monster

Submitted by Matt Birkenhauer

Tuesday, 7 July 2026

In the horror show I was streaming on cable last night, a monster, unable to move more than a slow walk, “chases” a young woman (of course), who is running, breathless and in a panic, from the still lumbering monster; and I’m thinking, “Hey, just try walking FASTER than the monster.”

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