Harry gets home late one night and his wife says: 'Where in the world have you been?'
Harry replies, 'I was out getting a tattoo.'
'A tattoo?' she frowned. 'What kind of tattoo did you get?'
'I got a hundred dollar bill tattooed on my privates,' he said proudly.
'What the world were you thinking? she said, shaking her head in disgust. 'Why on earth would retired School Superintendent get a hundred dollar bill tattooed on his privates?'
Well for one, I like to watch my money grow.
Two, once in a while I like to play with my money.
Three, I like how money feels in my hand.
And, lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred bucks anytime you want.'
Harry is recovering in room 232 at the St. Johns Hospital.