The Camel and the Corporate Rep

Submitted by freezer101

Wednesday, 28 January 2009

A representative from a large oil company is sent over to a desert in the middle east to meet with a nomad leader about drilling for oil.

When the rep gets to the desert, he finds out that there is no motorized transportation, and needs to take a camel into the desert to meet with the nomad leader.

Searching the outskirts of the desert, he comes across the only camel outlet in the area, and requests a rental.
The merchant tells the guy that he's fresh out of camels and that the guy has to wait until one returns.

The rep explains that he can't wait and needs the camel now, or the oil deal will be blown.

Thinking for a minute, the merchant says he does have a camel he can rent, but the camel has a problem.

"What kind of problem does the camel have?" he asked.
The merchant explained that the camel stops every 25 miles, and needs to be jacked-off before it will go any further.

Incredulous, the rep doesn't believe him, and says that he simply must get to the nomad deep in the desert for this oil deal.

So the merchant agrees to rent him the camel the reduced price of $100, and throws in all of the provisions necessary for the journey.

Satisfied, the rep heads out into the desert thinking about what the merchant told him of the camel stopping every 25 miles to get jacked-off or it wouldn't go any further.

Laughing it off, he continued on. "Just isn't possible," he mused. "Whacking a camel off in the middle of a desert, that's absurd," he thought.

Sure enough, the camel stops cold at what seemed like 25 miles.

Checking his GPS, sure enough 25 miles had passed.
Jumping down from the double humper, the rep tries to pull the camel along but he wouldn't budge. "Great, now what's wrong. I got to get this camel going," he said.
So he tries everything, pushing, pulling, begging, slapping, but the camel doesn't budge.

Finally, he starts thinking about what the merchant told him about jacking the camel off every 25 miles before it would move again.

The rep doesn't want to do this, but is forced to try because he must close the oil deal or possibly lose his job.

Getting under the camel, he starts stroking the camel with one hand. Eventually he's gotta use both hands to do the stroking.

After about 5 minutes of sweat inducing work, the camel shoots off about 2 cups of spooge into the sand.

The rep is thoroughly disgusted now, but gets back on the camel.

Sure enough, the camel starts moving again.

"Holy frickin' shit, I just frickin' whacked off a frickin' camel," he incredously said.

On his way again, the rep hoped that this was only a one-time thing.

Unfortunately, the camel stopped again after about 25 miles. In fact, his GPS indicated it was exactly 25 miles, give or take 3 or 4 yards.

"Holy frickin' mother shit, not again, he complained. And this cock-sucking, masturbatory monster isn't even taking me out to dinner first. What the frickin' am I, a frickin' camel whore," he frickin' complained.

Hopping down again, he performed the now ritualistic masturbation for the twisted camel, and after a nights rest, were off making headway deep into the desert.

This went on for a few days, and the rep recalled jacking the camel off about 7 or 8 times. He just couldn't believe it.
"Hell, I frickin' hope no one frickin' finds out about this frickin' shit, my job would be the least of my worries," he thought.

Riding now for what seemed like more than 25 miles, the rep started to get curious, but decided not to make any sudden moves so the camel was distracted and ended up stopping again. Slowly pulling out his GPS he noticed that they had traveled 49.99 miles.

"Holy frickin' mother of masturbators, maybe this is finally over with," he hoped.

But as soon as the GPS read 50 miles the camel stopped dead it its tracks.

"Frickin horny bastard," he said, and hopped down off the camel to perform the whack-off session.

Under the camel now, the rep is jacking-off the camel but nothing is happening.

He tries poking a fist up the camel's butt to egg him on, but no luck there either.

Now his arms and hands are getting really tired, and nothing is working on this frickin" beast.

Frustrated, he starts talking to the camel about shooting off so they can get moving.

After working on the camel for over a half an hour, he stops and walks over to the camel, motioning to the camel with his hand like he was jacking the camel off, saying, "you like, you like, eh?

The camel, sheepishly looking at the rep, starts shaking his head no in response to the rep's hand motions.

The camel then stopped shaking his head, and pursed his lips while blowing out air.

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