An Irishman was walking around a posh neighbourhood looking for work. It wasn't going that well, until he came to a house owned by a old lady in her 70s.
"Top o' the morning ta ya, mam. Um just goin round the neighbourhood askin the good folks if they'd like sum odd jobs done around tha home?"
"Oh, you mean like the Scouts on Bob-A-Job Week?" replies the lady.
"Yeh, summut like that, mam."
"Well, if you could paint my porch for fifty pounds, you could do that!" says the delighted lady.
"Okay then, m'lady, I'll give yer a holler when um done."
Forty minutes later, the Irishman knocks on the door and the lady answers, then hands him the money.
"Just for yer information, missus, it's naw a porch - it's a be-um-dubya..."