Q: How many Democrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Just one, but it really gets screwed.
Q: What happens when you cross a pig with a Democrat?
A: Nothing. There are some things a pig won't do.
Q: What's the difference between a Democrat and a trampoline?
A: You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
Q: What do you get when you offer a Liberal a penny for his thoughts?
A: Change.
Q: Why can't John Kerry tell a joke?
A: Because all the botox keeps him from smiling!
Q: What's the difference between a Democrat and a prostitute?
A: The prostitute gives value for the money she takes.
Q: What do Democrats and porn stars have in common?
A: They are experts in switching positions in front of a camera.
Q: What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead Democrat in the road?
A: Vultures will eat the skunk.
Q: How do you confuse a Liberal?
A: You don't. They're born that way.