"My rheumatism is so bad, I can't hardly turn my head. Get up off the floor Moleturd."
"My eyesight has gotten so bad that I can hardly see Moleturd crawling over towards the bathroom."
"Listen! Ha! Ha! I really have gas bad tonight. Sometimes I fog up the car windshield."
"Yeah, we're all getting a little older. At least we still have our driver's license."
"Moleturd. Crawl outside and get my car warming up. You're our designated driver tonight, remember?"
"Snnnnnzzzzzzz."
"Looks like we might be here awhile."
'Wake up, Moleturd! Where's the ice bucket?"
-I.B. Moleturd