My friend Harold is really in a mess. He's even afraid to come out of his house. It's been three months now and he's having everything delivered to his door.
See, Harold had always wanted to be a priest and his own priest recommended that he stay at a monastery for a couple of years.
There's where he screwed up.
During the sworn rites, he got his tongue all tangled up and instead of taking a "Vow of Silence" he took a "Sow of Violence!".
That thing is horrible and follows him everywhere when he gets out. Took a chunk out of his leg before he escaped to his house.
You gotta watch that kind of stuff.