George Michael was admitted to the Emergency Room this evening after complaining about chronic piles.
He'd been on a crash diet and suspected his partner had tried to help him by hiding goodies 'in case he got the munchies late at night'.
Doctors probed and poked the entertainer before putting him up on a MRI scanner to diagnose the problem.
Eventually the ER locum gave him a local anesthetic, dived in with some two-foot long pliers and pulled out a mystery object.
"Ah Mr Michael," Dr Strangelove commented, "seems I have found your Careless Wispa."