A young lady stops by her grandfather's house, Fergus McCarthy, on the way to a dance. She wants to introduce her boy friend to her granddad. As they are chatting, her boy friend spies some peanuts on the coffee table. He begins munching on them as they converse.
After about an hour, they are getting ready to leave and he thanks Fergus McCarthy, the grandfather, for his hospitality and especially for the peanuts.
"Oh, your welcome young man," Ferg says. "I appreciate you finishing them up. Ever since I lost my dentures I can only suck the chocolate off of them."
"You wizened bastard" shrieked the boyfriend, causing Fergus to slash his face with a Stanley knife "That will learn you you disrespectful twat" said Fergus as he then undid the boys zip and chewed on his gonads.