15 Excellent put-downs about famous women! - 4 of 4

Submitted by Inchcock

Thursday, 17 May 2012

15 Excellent put-downs about famous women! - Four

1)
Sharon Stone (when told Madonna has said she wants to kiss her)
Not in this lifetime. Why? Because I'm the only one she hasn't done it to.

2)
Morrissey (about Madonna, 1986)
She is closer to organised prostitution than anything else.

3)
Joan Rivers (about Madonna)
She is so hairy, when she lifted up her arm, I thought it was Tina Turner in her armpit.

4)
Mr Blackwell (about Mariah Carey)
Mariah the fashion pariah ... the queen of catastrophic kitsch!

5)
Joan Crawford (about Judy Garland)
I didn't know her well, but after watching her in action I didn't want to know her well.

6)
Bette Midler (about Helen Reddy)
She ought to be arrested for loitering in front of an orchestra.

7)
John Simon (about Barbra Streisand)
A cross between an aardvark and an albino rat.

8)
Laura Lee Davies (about Tina Turner)
All legs and hair with a mouth that could swallow the whole stadium and the hot-dog stand.

9)
Ralph Novak (about Yoko Ono)
Her voice sounded like an eagle being goosed.

10)
Joan Rivers (about Yoko Ono)
If I found her floating in my pool, I'd punish my dog.

11)
Barbara Ehrenreich (about Nancy Reagan)
A senescent bimbo with a lust for home furnishings.

12)
Clement Freud (about Margaret Thatcher)
Attila the Hen!

13)
George Bernard Shaw (about Queen Victoria)
Nowadays a parlor maid as ignorant as Queen Victoria was when she came to the throne would be classed as mentally defective.

14)
Mr. Blackwell (about Camilla Parker-Bowles)
In feathered hats that were once the rage, she resembles a petrified parakeet from the Jurassic age. A royal wreck!

15)
Bartholomew Utterswaithe (about Queen Elizabeth 11)
Of course I admire her, and how she manages so well nowadays being worth only £8 billion!


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