A prominent biogeneticist is conducting advanced research on the similarities between primates and humans.
After a decade of preparation, he is now ready for his most daring experiment to date: the mating of a human with a gorilla.
Having spent years searching for the proper gorilla, he finally selects a supple simian from the London Zoo.
Finding the human partner, however, will be more difficult he thought.
First, he designs an extensive and detailed forty-page questionnaire.
Next, he places a classified ad in the London Review of Books: "Wanted: Single White male, between 25 and 27 years of age, with a Master's degree, non-smoker, who loves Mozart, animals and long walks on the beach, to impregnate a female gorilla. Stipend: £9000."
To his delight, the researcher receives over two hundred applicants, and promptly sends a copy of the questionnaire to each of the respondents.
Over 90 percent of the questionnaires are returned, but only one applicant fulfills all the requirements.
An interview is arranged, and the applicant arrives to meet with the researcher.
They talk for three hours, and the researcher finally says, "I'm thrilled to have found you Juan. You're exactly the man I've been looking for!"
"Are you free to begin on Monday?"
"Just a minute," says Juan. "You've asked me a lot of questions, but before we go any further, I have a few requirements of my own. First, there'll be no kissing on the lips. Second, any offspring from this union must be raised in my own faith. And, finally, could you give me a couple of weeks to scrape up the £9000?"