Sharon Osborne - My Fake Diary

Friday, 28 June 2013

Dear Diary - Ozzy has told me that he is going to change and he plans on giving up all drugs and all of his non-stop drinking and start acting like Rob Petrie on the old Dick Van Dyke Show.

He also said that he is going to enroll in an Internet diction course so that he can talk in an intelligent audible manner.

I swear sometimes I cannot understand a single word that the old boozin' bloody, bloke is speaking.

I will stay with him and give him another damn chance.

Sharon Osbourne