Queen Elizabeth II - My Fake Diary

Saturday, 19 June 2010

Dearest Diary, I must confess that I am extremely concerned about England's efforts in The World Cup. Those poor boys have had a lot of bad publicity during the past few months, regarding 'affairs of the heart' etc.

I am concerned that this WILL affect their abilities on the field, so to speak. I am aware that a number of them have been 'playing the field' in the past, and NOT the green turf.

Really, you would think that the British and World public would be over being concerned about such goings on. After all, it has been going on throughout history when there were no video cameras, newspapers, journalists, and so on.

It truly saddens me that my "subjects' " private lives are NOT private in any shape or form.

My plan is to speak to the Government officials (who are by 'no means' squeaky clean themselves) and re-write some of the 'Laws of this Great Country' when in comes to broadcasting details of the private lives of 'people in the news'.

I do know that a great majority of my subjects 'enjoy' extra-marital affairs, but because they are NOT in the public eye, they can go about their business in relative peace and obscurity.

This privilege should be 'enjoyed' by everyone. I AM the Queen of England and have been very well protected, as far as MY private life is concerned.

Surely, no-one in their right minds would believe that I have remained faithful to Philip all of these years. My subjects just have to follow "Philips'" shenanigans to figure out why.

Today, I must admit, I DO love my Royal Corgies more than I love Philip.

I am so happy that I wrote my memoirs and deposited them in a Safety Deposit Box. The truth WILL come out one day. I just wish it could be in my own lifetime.

Goodnight Dear Diary.