Nick C Legg - My Fake Diary

Tuesday, 29 November 2011

Dear Diary,
Sat behind George Osborne today while he made his Autumn speech, god almighty did he have the wind or what,those Westminster Curry's are getting stronger lately. Frankly I thought at one stage I would throw up it was that bloody pungent! To add to my discomfort I was duty bound to do the old 'nodding dog' routine in appreciation of George's warblings or else forgo my rum ration...most of his speech was, as expected utter bollocks of course.
I must confess I was somewhat 'aroused' in the trouser department when big Ed Balls stood up in opposition, judging from the bulge in his trousers I'd say he lives up to his name alright, what a whopper...even Jacqui Smith was squirming I noticed, probably having a multiple knowing that slapper.