Lucifer - My Fake Diary

Sunday, 13 October 2013

"I've been spending a lot of time at church lately. Not that I want to become a friend of Jesus or turn around my egregious evil ways. No, I'm content being as nasty as I've always been. Folks think I hang out in drug houses, saloons, bordellos, terrorist camps, penitentiaries. Evil places with evil people. Well, I do. That's always a given. But what's wrong with going to church and seeing what kind of hell I can raise there? Who do you think was really behind the Children's Crusades? Or all the other wars over religion? Was it God? Pleeeeeeaase! Hey, that was some wicked voodoo I pulled with the Roman Catholic priests and the little boys, wasn't it? Joan of Arc burned at the stake? Who lit the fire? Yep. - I try to make it to church every day. I can quote Scripture better than Jesus. Check it out in The Holy Bible. Gotta go now. I'm off to a Mosque. Can't forget my Quran or my machine gun."


Previous Dates Next Dates

« Full list of Spoof Celebrity Diaries

Send to a friend

Tell your friends about The Spoof!

Go to top
85 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more